


Fatherhood

by canthelpmyselves



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Dad!Barry, Loss of Powers, M/M, original child character - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-27 05:36:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16212527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canthelpmyselves/pseuds/canthelpmyselves
Summary: His name is Chris. He's four years old. When he shows up at the bar, looking for Lisa, he completely changes Len's life.





	1. Meeting Chris

“Miss Lisa?” 

Len, Mick and Lisa looked at the kid standing beside Lisa’s seat with confusion. He couldn’t be more than 4 or 5 years old, so what was he doing in a bar? The kid mumbled to himself, eyes closed up in concentration, before studying Lisa shyly.

Len bit back a smirk at the appraisal but Mick was too amused not to tease. “Snart, you gonna give him a shovel talk?” Lisa shot him a glare and slapped his shoulder.

“Um, excuse me, please?” the kid said again in a hushed whisper.

Len notice the bartender glancing their way and sighed. “What do you want, short round?”

The kid never even looked his way, eyes trained on Lisa, but his tiny body did tense up. “M-Miss Lisa? I need help,” he whispered. “D-Daddy said if I was in trouble to find you but I’m nots in trouble, not really, but Daddy is and I don’t know where to go and if I go to the lab they’ll know about me and Daddy don’t want that so I came here but you weren’t here so I waited and waited and then you got here and I still don’t know what to do, socanyouhelpme?”

Lisa’s eyes widened at the rambling speech. “Kid, who are you?” she finally asked. 

“Christopher Austin Allen,” the kid mumbled shyly. “Daddy calls me Pum’kin.”

Len tensed and stared at the kid closely. He had brown hair that corkscrewed into tight curls, big green eyes and freckles across his nose and chin… No! It couldn’t be! “What’s your dad’s name, kid?” he demanded.

Chris finally looked at Len and bit his bottom lip. “Barry,” he answered. “My Daddy’s name is Barry.”

***

Len shoved his parka and gun into the closet and turned to look at the kid. He could see the resemblance. Chris looked like a miniature Scarlet. He also had Barry’s lack of self-preservation, since he had willingly accompanied them to their safe house. But Barry didn’t have any kids. Len had done a thorough background check. Mick hung up his jacket and put away his gun while Lisa guided the boy to the sofa.

“You know the dad?” Mick asked quietly.

Len frowned and stomped over to the coffee table and sat down in front of the kid. “What kinda con you trying, Kid?” he growled. “I happen to know that Barry Allen doesn’t have any kids. Especially not one as old as you.”

Chris pulled his knees up and wrapped his arms around them tight. “Daddy won’t like it if I tell you everything. He’ll be sad cause I’m only s’posed to talk to Miss Lisa.”

Lisa gave Len a stern look before reaching out to rub Chris’ back soothingly. “You said your dad was in trouble. What kind?”

Chris sniffled and looked up at her. “The zoom man took all of Daddy’s speed. Now he ain’t the Flash no more. I don’t care, cause I love him anyway, but then the soldier men came. They broke in and took Daddy. I was in the panicky room. As soon as the men broke in, Daddy put me there. I waited, like I’m s’posed to, but Daddy never leaves me ‘lone. When he’s gone I have Rob or Hart. But no one come get me cause Daddy didn’t call cause the soldier men took him too fast.”

Lisa frowned thoughtfully. “Hart? Hartley Rathaway?”

“Your dad’s the Flash?” Mick growled.

Len felt his temper rise. “Zoom took his speed?”

Chris’ little head whipped from side to side as he tried to catch each question. Confused and scared, he began to tear up. As soon as the first tear slid down his cheek Lisa pulled him onto her lap and hugged him tight.

“Shhh,” she murmured softly. “It’s okay. We’re going to find your dad, okay?”

“We should get in touch with the Flash’s team,” Len said, careful to keep his tone even.

“No!” Chris cried. “You can’t! Daddy says they can’t know about us! They’d take me ‘way!”

“Why would they take you away?” asked Len, determined to know everything. Chris cringed closer to Lisa, mouth shut tight. Len tried to keep his voice reasonable. “Kid, we can’t help if we don’t know what’s going on.”

Chris chewed on his bottom lip for a long moment before slowly holding out his hands. Len, Lisa and Mick watched as ice slowly formed at his fingertips before crawling up his arms. His eyes turned a vivid blue and his hair turned white. Small flakes of snow began falling from the ceiling in gentle swirls.

“Daddy says I’m special,” Chris whispered, “cause I got lots and lots of power. He says bad people would hurt me and make me do bad things if they knew. He says even the good guys would tests me. Not like the math and reading tests Daddy and Hart gives me, but with meda... meti.. um, needles and stuff.” 

“You mean medical?” Lisa asked gently as Chris’s powers receded and his hair and eyes changed back.

Chris nodded, eyes wide with worry as his powers faded away. “They tests Daddy ‘most every day. Sometimes it hurts him, but he don’t tell them that,” he whispered, as if telling a secret. “They tests more when he hurts.”

Len’s jaw clenched in anger. Snow and Ramon used Scarlet for medical testing and didn’t give a damn if it hurt? Why the hell would he let them do that? What kind of fucked up team did he have???

Lisa stroked Chris’ hair gently, trying to keep him calm. “So your daddy taught you control?”

The kid smiled widely, looking proud. “Daddy trains me. Hart teaches me to read and write and add and s’tract. He says I’m ‘pressive.”

Len bit back a worried sigh. “He’s right, kid. You are definitely impressive.”

Chris’ expression faltered as he looked up at Lisa. “Will you find my Daddy?” he asked sadly.

Lisa hugged him close and looked at her brother and Mick. “Of course we will,” she promised. “We’ll find him as soon as we can.”

Chris smiled and threw his arms around her neck tightly. “Thank you, Miss Lisa! Daddy was right.”

“About what?” asked Len.

Chris bit his bottom lip shyly, hugging Lisa tighter as he looked at Len. “Daddy said she’s his hero.”

Lisa sniffled and smiled at Chris. Len looked at Mick warily. What had they gotten themselves into?

***

Len paced the floor as he listened to the phone ring. This was the fourth burner number he had tried. It went to voicemail so he hung up and dialed a fifth number. Lisa had gotten the kid to sleep and Mick was whipping up a light meal. On the third ring the phone was finally answered. 

“Hello?” Rathaway greeted tensely. 

“Missing a kid?” Len growled. 

Rathaway gasped softly. “Cold? Is he okay? Where are you?”

“Safe house on 42nd street,” Len growled. “How soon?”

“We’re close. Five minutes,” Rathaway said quickly before hanging up. 

Len pocketed the cell and walked into the kitchen. Lisa was already eating some pasta salad and Mick was placing mugs of hot coffee at each seat. He sat down and reached for the coffee cup, taking a sip. “No answer from Scarlet’s phone. I finally got through to Rathaway. He’ll be here soon.”

“Let me see if I understand everything,” Lisa began slowly. “The Flash is Barry Allen, the CSI you have been crushing on for years.” Len shot her a glare over the rim of his cup, but she just smirked. “I’ve seen the photos on your phone, Lenny. It’s bordering on creepy. And don’t think we won’t be discussing how your crush is also your enemy, later. To continue, Hartley Rathaway, part-time Rogue, is some sort of nanny for the son of said hero that no one else knows exists. A son who is a meta. And now the Flash is powerless, kidnapped and his meta-powered son hunts me down because his superhero dad told him I was the Flash’s hero.”

Len sighed and gave a short nod. “Seems so.”

A knock on the door had Len out of his chair and reaching for his gun. He motioned for the other two to stand back as he went to look through the peephole. He slid the gun into the waistband of his jeans and hurriedly opened the door for Hartley and Barry. The speedster (former?) looked haggard. His wide, fear-filled eyes were on Len. 

“Chris?” he demanded, his voice trembling.

Len quickly stepped aside to let them in. He tilted his head toward the hallway. “Lisa put him down in her bedroom. He’s asleep.”

Barry was already hurrying down the hallway before Len could close the door. He followed, a couple of steps behind as Barry found the right bedroom on the second try. Barry rushed forward, dropping to his knees beside the bed and gently touched Chris’ cheek. Len watched quietly as Barry gave a broken, almost silent, sob before pressing a kiss to the sleeping child’s hair. 

Two full minutes passed before Barry managed to pull himself together. He tucked the blanket around Chris and moved away from the bedside. He stepped into the hallway and closed the door halfway before turning to Len. A second later he had his arms wrapped tight around the startled thief, hugging him close.

“Thank you,” Barry cried softly. 

Len’s first instinct was to flinch from the unexpected touch. His second was to deepen the hold and comfort Barry until he stopped crying. Len went with his third. He patted Barry’s shoulder twice before firmly pushing Barry back until there was six inches between them. 

“Thought you were kidnapped, kid,” he said gruffly.

Barry’s shoulders sagged and he looked away. “If not for Hart, I would have been,” he said, his tone one of exhaustion. Barry drew in a shaky breath and stepped around Len to head back up the hallway. Hartley, Lisa and Mick were standing in the living room, watching them. Barry moved straight to Lisa and pulled her in close, pressing a kiss to her hair like he had his son. “There is nothing I can ever do that is grand enough to repay you,” he said sincerely. He stepped back, but kept his hands on her upper arms. “If you ever need anything from me, no matter what it is, it’s yours.”

Lisa quirked an eyebrow and smirked, trying to lighten the atmosphere. “What if I need a quick hand for a heist?” she teased. 

“Tell me when and where,” Barry said solemnly. Everyone stared at him in stunned disbelief. Barry’s expression never wavered. “You kept my son safe,” he said quietly. “A heist means nothing to me compared to that. I’d steal you the Hope Diamond if you asked me to.”

“About that,” Len said, slipping his hands into his pockets and leaning his shoulder against the wall. “Since when do you have a son?”

Barry tensed slightly before looking at Hartley. “Would you…?”

Hartley nodded immediately and hurried down the hall to the bedroom. He slipped inside and shut the door all the way. Seeing the curious looks from Mick, Lisa and Len, Barry sighed. “There are some things I don’t want my son to know yet. Things I’m pretty sure you’re going to ask about.”

Lisa nodded her head toward the kitchen. “We can talk in here. I made coffee.” Barry followed her, the other two men right behind him. He sat at the table, Lisa across from him and Mick to the left. Len leaned back against the counter and crossed his arms. 

“How about we start with an easy one,” he drawled. “Why did you tell the kid to look for Lisa if he was in trouble?”

Barry gave a sharp snort. “That’s far from an easy one,” he answered. “The short answer is, because she’s his mother.” Seeing their expressions of shock, he shrugged. “Told you it wasn’t an easy one.”


	2. History Lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry explains how he came to have a son no one but Hartley knew about.

“I never told anyone this, but when I entered the singularity a year ago, I ended up in another timeline,” Barry said, his eyes on his coffee. “It wasn’t much different than this one, honestly. There was a Flash, but it wasn’t me. It was a woman named Sela. There was still a Rogues Gallery, led by Captain Cold. Heatwave was a hero, though. He was part of a group called the Justice Initiative.”

He took a sip of his coffee, grimacing because it was strong and bitter. “I was a CSI, even in that life. I met… someone. He asked me out and I said no. For weeks I said no. He was… determined. Eventually I said yes, more out of annoyance and the hope he would back off, than anything else. I expected it to be a disaster.”

Len’s hands clenched tightly as Barry’s expression softened and a light filled his eyes. Love. Barry had loved this man.

“It turned out to be one of the best nights of my life,” he continued. “Such a weird, but unforgettable date. We went to a county fair just outside of town. Silly carnival games, cotton candy, and horridly greasy fair food. He won me a stuffed giraffe. I won him a pair of goldfish in a plastic baggie. When he took me home, he kissed my cheek like a true gentleman and asked me out for a second date.”

Barry linked his hands and his fingers lightly caressed his ring finger. Looking closely, Len could barely see the outline of where a ring had been. His stomach flipped with jealousy. 

“Six months later we got married,” Barry said, his voice cracking slightly. “A year later, we asked Lisa to be a surrogate for us. She agreed immediately. We got donor eggs and used in vito to fertilize them with both our sperm. It took three tries, but a year later, we had Chris.”

“Why Lisa?” asked Len roughly. 

Barry sighed and ran a hand over his jaw. “First, let me explain that, when I experience a different timeline, I have a past that I don’t really remember at first, but the longer I’m there, the more I settle into it and that life becomes part of my memories. I feel as if I actually lived it, even with the memories from other timelines. So, what I’m about to tell you about that Barry’s childhood didn’t happen to me, but I still _feel_ as if it was my life.”

Barry sipped his coffee and cleared his throat. “In that timeline, Lewis Snart was killed during a failed heist. You were already a criminal well on your way to infamy so Lisa went into foster care. Joe never took me in. Lisa and I met in foster care and became friends. This me entered that timeline right after graduating college and starting at the CCPD. Lisa had joined the Rogues, but we were too close to stop being friends. In fact, Lisa’s the one who introduced me to… to my husband. He was, um, part of the rogues,” Barry said hesitantly.

“You got hitched to a Rogue?” Mick snorted. Barry blushed and nodded. “Which one?”

Len watched Barry tense and begin fidgeting. He quickly ran through the names of everyone who had ever been on one of his crews. None of them were good enough for Barry.

“None of your business,” Barry said firmly. 

Len stared at Barry closely. “What happened?” he asked. While everyone looked at him, he kept his eyes locked on Barry. “Why are you and your son in this timeline and not that one? Where’s your husband?”

Devastation filled Barry’s eyes and his body shook slightly. “War,” he mumbled. He took a few seconds to breathe in through his nose and out through his mouth to calm himself. He swiped away the tears before they could fall. “A full-on genocide,” he said sadly. “All across the globe, metas were being rounded up and imprisoned just for having powers. It didn’t matter if they were innocents or criminals. In some countries, they were being executed immediately upon discovery. We lost so many friends.” Barry trembled for a second before taking a deep breath. “Chris was almost two years old when they came for us. My husband was trying to hold off the soldiers so we could get away. There were too many. I tried to save him,” Barry sobbed softly, “but there was so much blood…” 

Lisa quickly moved around the table and wrapped her arms around him tightly as he cried brokenly. For several minutes the only sound in the room was Barry’s wretched cries. Mick looked uncomfortable as he shifted in his seat. Len had to grip his elbows tightly to keep from taking Lisa’s place. 

When Barry finally managed to calm down some, he gulped the rest of his cooling coffee. “He was dying,” Barry whispered. “He told me to get Chris to safety. Begged me to keep Chris alive. So I did. I grabbed Chris and ran. Right into the speedforce which placed me back in the singularity from this timeline.”

“And that’s why no one knows you have a son,” Mick said. “Cause he’s a time aberration.”

Barry sighed and rubbed his temples. “Yes. My son isn’t supposed to exist here. For almost two years I’ve kept him a secret from my family and team.” Barry gave a ragged laugh. “He’s a better kept secret than my identity. Only four people knew of his existence until today. Hartley, Laurel Lance and Captain Singh and his husband.”

“Your boss knows about him?” Len asked with surprise. “Yet, your family doesn’t?”

Barry looked at Len for a long, silent moment. “When I first woke up with my powers, Caitlin, Cisco and Thawne put me through the wringer with testing and training. I’ve seen first hand how the military treats metas. I’ve seen how the public treats us. Even the Flash is viewed with suspicion and anger by many of the people who live here. For every person who cheers the Flash, there’s another who sees him as a freak, a threat. Not to mention what my enemies would do if they ever found out about him. My son is almost four years old. I refuse to let anyone treat him like that!”

The anger and frustration in Barry’s voice was obvious to them all. “I’m not stupid. I know that I can’t keep him a secret for much longer. That’s why I went to Captain Singh and Laurel. She’s helping me create the proper documents to legally make him my son in this time line. Birth certificate, hospital records, everything. The captain’s husband babysits when Hartley can’t.”

“Who is listed as his mother?” asked Lisa. The idea that some other version of her had given birth to a child was so surreal. Even if it was as a surrogate for someone else.

Barry gave a slight smile. “We made her up. Sort of. Alisa Gold. Ostensibly, she is someone I had a brief fling with in Starling. She’ll ‘pass away’ in a couple of weeks from some form of cancer. Not sure which, yet. Laurel hasn’t finished those records.”

“And you think this story will hold up?” Len asked critically. 

“Captain Singh and his husband are willing to say they were contacted by Laurel after Chris’ mother was diagnosed terminal in hopes of getting in touch with me. When asked, I’ll tell everyone I kept this quiet until I was able to take full custody of Chris.”

“What about your son?” Len pressed. “What are you going to do when he tells a different story than you? He didn’t hesitate to answer Lisa’s questions or tell us anything we wanted to know.”

“Of course he didn’t,” Barry sighed tiredly. “From the moment he was able to understand I’ve taught my son three very important rules. One, if he’s in trouble, he is to go to Saints and Sinners and find Lisa, tell her what is wrong and let her protect him. Later, I added Captain Singh to that rule, once he and his husband knew about Chris. Two, he is never to go anywhere without me, Hartley, Rob or Lisa. If someone tries to take him, he is to use his powers and get away, then follow rule number one. And three, he cannot let anyone see him use his powers unless he is in danger. I also made sure to teach him that he cannot tell anyone about our other life. He is never to mention it to anyone but me. I’ve made him memorize our story and explained to him why we have to lie about it. Chris is smart. He understands for the most part, and what he doesn’t understands, he trusts that I’m doing this for us, for our safety. Chris was still a baby when I changed the timeline, so he doesn’t remember that life much, anyway. He… he doesn’t remember his Dada,” Barry said tensely.

Len was silent for a moment. “Your husband exists here, doesn’t he?”

Barry tensed and sucked in a ragged breath. “I do not want to discuss him.”

“That’s why you don’t say his name,” Len pressed, ignoring the ice in his voice. “The kid is a meta with weather type powers. Is it Mardon?”

Barry’s jaw clenched for a second before he visibly forced himself to relax. “I am only going to say this once,” Barry bit out in a deadly serious voice. “Two years ago I lost the only person who ever truly loved me. He was more than a rogue or a criminal. He was my heart, my very soul. So no, my husband does not exist here. My husband bled out in our living room, giving his life so that I could get our son to safety.” 

Len flinched from the pain in Barry’s eyes. He hadn’t intended to hurt the younger man. He just… needed to know. His jealousy demanded it. He wanted to know who it was that had won Barry’s heart. What did they do or say that made him fall for a criminal? What made Barry look at this unnamed man in a way he would never look at Len?

Lisa cleared her throat and gently touched Barry’s hands. “Chris said you were kidnapped.”

Barry shuddered as if chilled before nodding. “General Eiling sent soldiers to bring me in. He must have heard I don’t have my powers anymore. Zoom managed to drain them from me a week ago. I’ve learned from our lab’s version of Gideon that this timeline has a few differences from the original. In that the original Hartley and I couldn't stand one another. Now, we're neighbors and friends. He actually helped me expose Thawne and get my dad acquitted. Zoom used to be someone I knew, someone I trusted to work with me. In this one, he’s someone different. Someone much more dangerous, which is saying something. In the original timeline, Zoom was Hunter Zolomon. This Zoom is a man named Jay Garrick. He was the Flash on another world before he became addicted to the speed force and it corrupted him. He is my father’s doppleganger.”

Barry sighed tiredly. “I got lucky, today. Hartley was just coming home when he spotted Eiling’s men dragging me from the building. He followed us to the Ferris airstrip where they had a plane waiting to fly me to some base. He used his powers to knock them out and rescue me. By the time we got back home, Chris was gone. We went to Saints, but we were too late. We didn’t know where you were, or how to get in touch with you, and the number Hartley had for you was no longer working, so we were checking each safe house in hopes of finding you when Cold called.”

Len grimaced. He hadn’t thought to let Hartley have his new cell number when he returned from the Legends. In fact, he had only given it to Lisa and Mick. No one else would have any way of contacting him.

“Whatcha gonna do now?” asked Mick.

Barry sighed and shook his head. “Until I can regain my powers or find a way to make Eiling back off, I’ll have to take Chris and go into hiding. Central isn’t safe for us right now. Star City is too close to another military base. Maybe Gotham or Bludhaven. I have a couple of friends on the police force there who might be able to help.”

Len pushed off from the counter and slid his hands into his pockets. “I have an idea,” he said calmly.


	3. Welcome to the Waverider

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Len brings Barry and Chris aboard the timeship and into the company of the Legends.

Barry watched carefully as Cold walked up the ramp and began speaking in a low voice to the group. Lisa and Mick stood on either side of him like sentinels. He shifted his arms to cradle his sleeping son closer to his chest as he prayed he was making the right choice. He only really knew Martin and Jax of this crew. At some point in the past (or was it the future?), Kendra and Carter left the Waverider. Hunter is missing or dead. Len apparently had been dead, then rescued. He and Mick left then, returning to the time period they were taken from. According to Gideon, Barry changing the timeline is what allowed Len to be rescued from the Oculus in the first place.

Sometimes, time travel really confused the hell out of Barry.

“Don’t worry,” Mick grumbled. “Snart’ll convince them.”

“It’s not that,” Barry admitted wearily. “I’m just not sure the Waverider is the best place to hide. I mean, your missions aren’t exactly safe, are they?”

Mick shrugged, unconcerned. “Ain’t like you gotta help out. All you gotta do is stay on the ship with your boy. Once you figure out how to get your speed back, we’ll bring you back to here and now.”

Barry watched Cold walk back toward them. He ruthlessly pushed away the flutter in his chest as the older man’s eyes locked onto him. 

“Hope you got everything, Scarlet,” Len drawled. “We’re leaving now.” He grabbed one of the bags by Barry’s feet and carried it on board. Mick grabbed the other and followed. 

Barry started to take a step but Lisa grabbed his shoulder quickly. Barry turned to face her. Lisa looked at Barry for a moment before looking at Chris. She slowly reached out and touched his cheek. The last two days had been stressful for Barry as they hid out at the safe house, waiting for the Waverider to arrive. Barry had noticed that Lisa seemed to gravitate toward his son, and knew she was growing attached. Unsurprisingly, so had Chris. He loved following ‘Miss Lisa’ around and watching her do things.

“Be careful, okay?” she said gently. “I… I know he’s not really...”

Barry made a shushing sound and leaned in to kiss her forehead. In truth, he was having a hard time remembering she wasn't the same Lisa who gave him his son. “He loves you, too,” he whispered. “We’ll see you sooner than you imagine.”

Lisa gave a wavering smile and nodded. Barry smiled and hurried toward the ship. Once on board he followed Mick, who was waiting in the corridor for him. They passed a few doors and turned a corner before Mick stopped in front of another door. He waved his hand over a panel and the door slid open.

“Was the Hawk's,” he said in his grumbly voice. “Figured you and the kid could share it.”

Barry nodded and walked over to lay Chris down on the bed. He took the bag Mick carried and began unpacking Chris’ clothes into the drawers built into the wall. He could feel Mick’s eye boring into his skull. “Something wrong?”

“You gonna tell him?” Mick asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Tell who what?” Barry asked cautiously.

Mick snorted and shook his head. “I may play dumb when it suits, but I’ve lived a lot longer than you know, kid. I was captured by the time masters and lived several lifetimes under their less-than-tender care. I learned to pay attention to my surroundings. I know who his father is,” he said, nodding toward Chris. 

Barry paled and had to brace his hands on the wall to keep his knees from buckling. “Y-you know? Why didn’t… you never...”

Mick snorted. “Didn’t figure it out until last night,” he admitted. “Went outside for a cigarette and saw you practicing with the kid. It’s the eyes that give it away. Right now he’s got your eyes, but when he uses his powers, he’s got Len’s.”

“Leon,” Barry corrected softly. “He went by Leon. He called me Bart. I always hated that name, until he said it. The way he smiled when he said it…” Barry sighed heavily and blinked away the tears trying to form. “No. I’m not going to tell Cold.”

“He deserves to know,” Mick argued. 

“Know what?” Barry hissed, focusing on the wall to try and center himself. “Know that someone who looked like him, but wasn’t him, was married to me, his enemy? That sometimes it’s almost impossible to breath when I look at him because if I look past the parka and the gun, for one tiny heartbeat I have Leon back.” Barry bit back a sob, eyes closing tight as he willed away the anger and frustration. “If I tell Cold, he’ll hate me for it. You know he will. He’ll see it as a weakness even though Leon was a different person from him.”

“Different how?” Mick grunted. “He was a criminal, like Snart. Protective, like Snart. Determined, like Snart. What was so different between the two?”

“Leon loved me!” Barry hissed, spinning and staring at Mick with tear-filled eyes. “He was… he was gentle and sweet and loving. From the moment we met I was important to him! Me! The clumsy, geeky nobody. He loved me for me! He didn’t give a damn about what I could do for him crime-wise. He never betrayed me or lied to me. He protected me and held me and laughed with me...” Barry sobbed and covered his face with his hands. “He loved me,” he whispered brokenly. 

Mick swallowed hard and left the room. He wasn’t good with emotional stuff. Never tried to be. He liked fires and fights and stealing. He liked Len and Lisa. He sorta liked Barry. He definitely liked Chris. Nothing and nobody else had ever really mattered. He didn’t confront Barry to hurt him. He just wanted Len to be happy, and Len was crazy for the speedster. Seemed simple enough to him. Barry loved some other Len, so why not this one, too? 

***

One. Two. Three. Four. Five.  
One. Two. Three. Four. Five.  
One. Two. Three. Four. Five.

Len drew in another breath and counted slowly before letting it out. It took 77 respirations before his hands stopped shaking. 123 until his stomach stopped churning. 204 before his heartbeat returned to normal. Slowly he opened his eyes and stared at the screen on the wall above the bed. 

Leon. Barry’s husband, the rogue who won the hero’s heart with a stuffed giraffe and cotton candy, was him. 

_No. Not me,_ his mind whispered. Barry hadn’t married him. Hadn’t fallen in love with him. He had fallen in love with someone else who just happened to look like him. He gripped his raised knees tightly to prevent himself from getting up from the floor and destroying something. He needed to think. To be rational. To figure out where to go from here. 

When he had gone to Barry’s room to drop off the bag he had carried to the bridge, he thought he was giving them enough time for Mick to show him to his room and leave, allowing Len the opportunity to speak to Barry alone. That was something he hadn’t been able to manage while waiting on the ship to arrive. Barry was always with Hartley or Lisa in the safe house. He had questions he knew he could get Scarlet to answer if he could just get him alone. He was just a few feet away from the open doorway when he heard Mick say the boy had his eyes. 

He had slipped into a small crevice in the steel walls and hidden as he listened to Barry admit that he had married Leon Snart. Hearing Barry talk about his husband was both brutal and exhilarating. Gentle, sweet and loving. He couldn’t remember the last time he was gentle or sweet. Had he ever been that way with anyone but Lisa? 

But there was similarities, too. Barry was important to him, as well. Even before he knew Barry’s name, he had wanted to know everything he could about the speedster. Not because they were enemies, but because he intrigued him. Physically, he had never wanted anyone the way he wanted Barry. Over time, as he got to know more and more about the younger man, his interests became more than just carnal. He respected Barry. Admired him. By the time Lewis had broken out and put that bomb in Lisa’s neck, he was more than a little in love with Barry.

So, where did that leave them, now? Barry said he and this Leon were two different people. He had loved Leon. Could he love him? Would he just be poor substitute for the man Barry married? 

“Mister Snart?” Gideon’s voice interrupted his thoughts, startling him. “Captain Lance is requesting that everyone report to the bridge so we may enter the time-stream.”

Len pushed himself up and banked out his expression. “On my way,” he replied. He glanced in the mirror to make sure no one could tell he was feeling off-kilter and made his way to the bridge. He could hear voices the closer he got.

“...heavy sleeper,” Barry said with a little chuckle. “Sometimes I think I’ll have to use a bullhorn to wake him.”

Len stepped into the large room and spotted Barry sitting between Amaya and Ray, his drowsy son securely bracketed in his arms. Len took his seat beside Mick and lowered the harness securely. He kept his face blank as Barry glanced his way. 

“Everyone strapped in?” Sara asked from the captain’s chair. “Gideon, take us into the time-stream.”

The ship lurched and they were in the air. Len watched Barry press his nose to the side of his son’s head and breathe in deeply. He had noticed that Barry did that a lot. It seemed to be his favorite thing to do when he held the boy. The Waverider gave a familiar shudder and punched through the air into the time stream, sending Len’s eyes rolling back. Even after all this time, and hundreds of jumps, he was still unused to the sensation. Finally the ship stopped and the harnesses released. 

“If you get sick or start bleeding from the eyes, don’t panic Barry,” Ray said, groping blindly for his harness to push it up.

“I’m fine,” Barry chuckled. “You forget, I’m used to the time stream.”

Len shook his head to clear it as he stood up. “Ev’uoy reven neeb no a emit pihs erofeb.” He huffed as his words came out backwards. 

Chris gave a wide yawn and snuggled closer to Barry for a second before slowly opening his eyes. “Daddy? Are we on the ship?”

“Yes,” Barry answered, smiling as he set his son on his feet. “Chris, this is Ray, Martin, Jax, Amaya, Nate and Sara. Say hello.”

Chris smiled shyly, clinging to Barry’s leg. “Hello,” he mumbled.

Ray, being little more than an overgrown kid himself, knelt and smiled widely. “Hey, little man! You like robots?”

Chris edged a little bit behind Barry, eyeing Ray warily. “Daddy says never trust strangers who gived me candy, toys or puppies.” Ray’s eyes went wide and he stared at Chris as if he had no idea what to say next. 

“Good rule to follow, kid,” Sara chuckled as she walked over to the two Allens. “So, Barry, is it? Oliver and Felicity have told me a lot about you.”

Barry gave her a slight smile. “I know Laurel,” he said gently. “She’s told me a lot about you. She is quite proud of what you’re accomplished.”

Sara smirked and winked. “Really? She’s never mentioned you. Does that make you her dirty little secret?”

Barry glanced down at his son. “In a way, yes,” he mumbled.

Sara looked at Chris and a flash of curiosity lit her eyes. “So, Leonard didn’t really tell us much, just that you need to get out of Central for a little while. Something about the military?”

Barry sighed and glanced toward Chris for a second before looking around the room at everyone else. “This might not be the right time...”

“Hey, squid,” Mick called out, using the nickname he had given Chris after seeing the kid fight Barry in the bathtub. Barry and Chris both looked over as Mick pushed himself to his feet. “Told ya that Gideon makes great milkshakes. What flavor ya want?”

Chris immediately hurried across the bridge to Mick’s side. “Nutty butter!”

Mick took his tiny hand and led him out of the room. Barry sagged with a bit of relief. As soon as Mick and Chris were out of hearing range he turned back to Sara. Time for some explanations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, I brought Laurel Lance back, also. She doesn't appear in the story, but is mentioned a couple of times. I mostly just wanted a lawyer for Barry and decided to use her.


	4. Leon and Bart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry explains the situation to Sara. Later, Len asks Barry about Leon.

Barry ran a hand through his hair nervously. “His name is General Eiling. He’s been trying to build a meta army for two years now. Maybe even longer. His goal is to gather some of the most powerful metas he can find, either brainwash them or control them through technology, and use them as weapons. I don’t have my speed anymore, so he wants me to experiment on.”

Ray’s jaw dropped. “What happened to your powers?”

Barry sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “There’s another speedster, Zoom. Three weeks ago, he kidnapped my foster father’s son and held him hostage. Joe made a deal. Zoom released Wally in exchange for draining my powers and adding them to his own.”

Len gripped the handle of his cold gun tightly. “What?!” he demanded. “They fucking took your speed and gave it to that psycho? You said they were drained, you didn’t say your own fucking team stole them!”

“I gave up my speed,” Barry corrected. “Wally’s life was on the line.”

Len growled as he shook his head. “And a team of supposed geniuses couldn’t think of a way to rescue the kid? Tell me, Scarlet, did any of them even attempt to talk you out of this?”

Barry tensed and shot Len a fierce glare. “It was my decision!”

“It was a bad one!” Len snapped. “You should have called me!”

Barry jerked slightly in surprise. “You? Why?”

Len rolled his eyes. “Have you forgotten what makes me your nemesis?” he asked, drawing his gun and bracing it on his shoulder. “I have the perfect antidote to an evil speedster.”

Barry eyed the cold gun with dislike. “I haven’t forgotten about your gun, Cold. I also haven’t forgotten that every time I did trust you, you betrayed me.”

It was harder than he thought it would be to keep his smirk in place. It had been a long time since Barry last looked at him with such disappointment. Was he comparing him to his husband? Len forced himself to keep a cool head. “Maybe. Maybe not. You apparently did forget that Central City is my town. I’m pretty invested in keeping the number of speedsters low. Preferably at one.”

“Well, congratulations,” Barry hissed. “That’s exactly what you have.”

Sara, who had been watching both of them carefully moved to Len’s side. She placed a hand on his arm and moved in close. “You okay?”

Len was in the process of turning his head when he saw the split second of jealousy that flickered in Barry’s eyes before he blanked out his expression. His heart rate sped up and he was able to give Sara a quick nod. “Peachy.”

“Daddy!”

Everyone turned as Chris ran back into the room, a swear of chocolate across his upper lip and a too-big cowboy hat on his head. “Unca Mick gived me a hat. It’s all mine!”

Barry grinned as he dropped to one knee and smiled tenderly at his son. “Wow, pumpkin. That’s really nice. Did you thank him?”

“Uh huh,” Chris nodded. “Unca Mick says I can visit a… a… um...” He turned and looked at the pyro questioningly.

Mick stood, feet apart and arms crossed. “Told him we’d maybe visit Salvation.”

Ray perked up and looked at Sara hopefully. Amaya looked around the room with confusion. “Salvation?”

Chris looked over at her with wide eyes. “Unca Mick says there’s horses and gun fights and a man named Hacks.”

“Hex,” Mick corrected.

“And I can wear my hat!” Chris said eagerly. He looked at Barry with big puppy eyes. “Can we, Daddy? Please?”

Barry kissed his nose. “We’ll see, pumpkin. For now, let’s get settled in our room, okay? Then I’ll talk to Captain Lance and Mick.”

Chris wrapped his arms around Barry’s neck and placed a smacking kiss on his cheek. “Okay, Daddy.” Barry stood and took Chris’ hand in his and walked off the bridge. 

Amaya shot Mick a teasing grin. “Uncle?”

Mick snorted and shrugged one shoulder. “It was either that or ‘Mister Mick’.”

Len started to walk off but Sara’s grip on his arm tightened a fraction. He looked back at her only to find her studying him a little too closely for his comfort. “What?”

Sara tilted her head, her eyes darting toward the doorway before meeting his again. “Something you want to tell me?” she asked.

Len pulled free and took a step back. “No.” He walked away quickly, uncomfortable with how easily she could read him. He paused outside Barry’s room. He could hear him talking to his son through the door, but the words were muffled. Len placed his hand against the cold metal wall and sighed softly. After a moment he continued on to his own room. 

***

According to his internal clock it was a little after 2am when Len heard soft footsteps heading past his room toward the kitchen. Having spent so long on the ship, he knew the sound of each Legend’s footsteps. These were different, so he knew it was Barry. Len quickly pulled on lounge pants and a long sleeved shirt before leaving the room. By the time he got to the kitchen, Barry was already sitting at a table, a cup of tea in front of him. He looked up tiredly, tensing slightly before relaxing again.

Len moved to the counter and had Gideon make him a cup of hot cocoa. Once it was ready he walked over and sat down across from Barry. “Can’t sleep?” he asked.

Barry’s eyes were on his cup. “I don’t need much,” he shrugged.

Len watched as the mini marshmallows in his cup began to melt. He had done a lot of thinking after he had gone to his room. If there was one thing he had learned about Barry over the years, it was that he had a habit of shouldering too much guilt and too much responsibility. Len wasn’t going to let that happen with this situation.

“Tell me about him,” he said calmly.

Barry looked up with confusion. “Who?”

Len sipped his cocoa before leaning forward and bracing his forearms on the table. “Leon.” Barry paled and his eyes widened in shock. Before he could run off Len tilted his head. “I overheard you and Mick earlier. Gotta admit, I’m not too surprised.”

Barry’s expression turned to wariness. “What do you mean?”

He shrugged as he watched Barry carefully. “You think some other version of me is the only one to notice how special you are, Barry? I’ve always known that you’re one of a kind.”

Barry’s cheeks turned pink, although the rest of his complexion was still ghostly white. “So you know. That doesn’t change anything,” he growled.

“It doesn’t change much,” Len corrected. “It doesn’t change my mind about you, in any way.” For a split second he saw disappointment in Barry’s eyes. “What it does change, is what I thought I knew about me. See, I always thought there was no life where the Flash and Captain Cold could ever be more than enemies. No world where we could ever do anything but battle one another. Now I know I was wrong. I want to know what he was like. What your life together was like.”

Barry watched him suspiciously. “Why? What difference would it make?”

Len was silent for a long moment. “Because I’m curious,” he said honestly. “Because I never pictured myself as a husband or father, which makes me wonder how different he was from me. Because I want to know why you loved him.” He hesitated for another few seconds. “Because I think you need to talk about him and who better to listen than me?”

Barry’s eyes were still suspicious as he stared at Len for a full two minutes, but his body lost some of it’s tension. “I loved him because he made it easy for me to,” he answered hesitantly. He was quiet for several seconds as he stared at Len, before sighing and looking down at his cup. “His life wasn’t much different than yours, I guess. Lewis was still an abusive sonovabitch. Leon tried to protect Lisa and himself, but he had scars, both physically and emotionally. Lewis died in prison when Leon was 22. He was already making a name for himself. He used to send Lisa postcards from the cities he stole in. She would show them to me and we would try to imagine what he was doing.”

Len watched carefully as Barry rubbed his ring finger absently. He wondered where the ring was. Did Scarlet still have it, maybe put away somewhere safe? Had it disappeared when he got to this timeline?

Barry smiled softly as he got lost in his memories. “He was dramatic as hell. Always had to make an entrance. He knew exactly how to work a room, whether it was with eloquent words or just a swish of his trench coat as he walked, he always garnered everyone’s attention.”

“Trench coat?” Len asked, thinking of the duster he wore in Salvation.

Barry nodded, sipping his tea. “He didn’t own a parka. No cold gun, either. Leon was a meta with ice powers, like Chris.” His eyes watered but he closed them briefly and took a few shaky breaths. When he opened them, there was a faraway look in his eyes and a warm smile on his face, as if he was picturing Leon in his mind. “His hair was all white and longer than yours. The eyes are the same, and so is the smirk. He laughed more. But he didn’t have your love of puns.”

Barry focused on Len and smiled weakly. “I used to miss that. The puns, I mean. I missed the names, too. He never called me by a real nickname, so hearing Scarlet again when I got to this timeline was…” Barry paused and a slight blush crept up his neck, “nice,” he mumbled. 

Len shifted slightly, a ballooning heat in his belly. “He called you Bart, right?”

Barry nodded with a slight grimace. “Never really liked that name, but he hated using Barry. Said he had dated a Barry when he was a teen and it didn’t end well. Still, he always said it with affection, even before we got together, so I didn’t mind it so much, from him. I made everyone else call me Barry.”

Len watched Barry closely as he smiled wistfully. These were obviously good memories for him. “How did you meet? You said Lisa introduced you,” he prompted.

Barry nodded and stood to replenish his tea. He grabbed a muffin, as well. “Lisa and I had a standing monthly date for dinner at a little Greek restaurant. One month, I think I’d been in that timeline for almost a year by then, Lisa couldn’t make it. She was really sick, so instead of letting me get stood up, Leon came to let me know she wasn’t coming.”

Barry chuckled softly. “I know it sounds strange, but to be honest, I wasn’t expecting you… I mean, him. I had almost forgotten that Captain Cold was her brother by that time. In that life, we never met before that night, you see. I still had my powers, but I wasn’t the Flash, so we had no reason to meet, I guess. Even as a CSI, I never ran into him. Never saw a file or worked a case of his. So, when he marched into the restaurant, my first instinct was to prepare to fight, because I still had the memories of my fights with you. When he spoke to the hostess and she pointed out me, I was already trying to think of how to quickly get him outside and away from the other diners.” Barry looked up and grinned. “Imagine my surprise when he sat down across from me, took off his sunglasses and said ‘I think I’m going to have to have words with my sister for not telling me how gorgeous you are,’.”

Len shoved his jealousy down as deep as he could. “What did you say?” he asked.

Barry chuckled again and a blush spread across his entire face. “I, um, may have stammered something about having a centrifuge and knowing how to use it,” he admitted with embarrassment. At Len’s amused look he tried to defend himself. “Come on! I was surprised, okay! I wasn’t expecting a criminal, who I still remembered trying to kill me on several occasions, to sit down and flirt with me!”

“So,” Len prompted carefully, “he asked you out, right?”

Barry nibbled at the muffin and nodded. “I said no. Two days later I received a vase of white and blue dahlias at work with a note asking me to dinner. I rang Lisa and asked her to tell him no and make him stop. When I got home, Leon was waiting outside my door. He asked me to have a drink with him. I told him to leave me alone. That I would never date a crook. That I knew he was just trying to use me.”

There was a flicker of guilt in Barry’s eyes as he set aside the rest of the muffin. “He kept coming back, though. No matter how insulting I was, he didn’t give up.” Barry sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. “He told me, a few weeks after we started dating, that he couldn’t give up. He said he fell in love with me the moment he saw me, that he just knew we were destined to be together.”

A single tear slid down Barry’s cheek. “He deserved better,” he whispered. “He was a thief and a killer and a liar when he needed to be, but he was a good man, too. He loved with his whole heart. He protected those he cared for. Defended those weaker than himself. He deserved to be loved and respected for the honorable man he was.”

“He had your love,” Len pointed out.

Barry stood and set his cup in the sink and tossed the half-eaten muffin in the trashcan. He walked toward the door, but stopped just before crossing the threshold. “He did,” he said softly. “I loved him. I loved him as much as I possibly could. I j-just...” Barry sucked in a deep breath, his voice breaking with emotion. 

Barry shook his head wearily before walking quickly back toward to his room. Len sat there for a long time, staring down at his half-full mug of cocoa, as Barry’s confession echoed in his head. There was something there, something he was missing, but damned if he could figure out what it was.


	5. Disagreements and Disappointments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Legends learn that Chris is an aberration and are not thrilled with the situation.

The next twenty hours were taken up with a mission in 1972 during the Vietnam War. Barry and Chris were to stay on the ship with Mick, who Sara insisted was not allowed off the Waverider due to the intense wildfire that had obliterated a nearby village. By the time the mission was completed, Len was beyond exhausted and more than a little angry with his teammates for the way they had fucked things up. 

Seriously, what made Stein and Sara think it was a good idea for Boyscout Ray to try and sneak his way into a military base to steal some plans from a general’s safe while he, the freaking master thief, played tag with the guards? So what if he could shrink himself down! Of course Palmer got arrested! Of course he then had to go in and get the plans! Even worse, Barry got dragged into it because they needed someone to bring them some equipment from the ship and Mick was DEFINITELY not allowed to run around unsupervised! 

“Stop glaring,” Barry said wearily.

Len looked over from his position by the med-bay door to meet Barry’s eyes. His hands clenched tighter in his pockets as he watched Barry gingerly pull his shirt down over the bandage covering where he had gotten shot. “I’m not glaring at you,” he pointed out.

“No,” Barry agreed with a sigh, “you’re just glaring in general. Stop it. It’s no one’s fault I got shot.”

“What makes you think I’m upset over that?” Len growled.

“Because you aren’t checking up on Ray, and he has two cracked ribs and a concussion. I only got winged by a stray bullet.”

Len hesitated for a moment before moving across the room and settling into a chair beside the medical bed. “Chris told us once that your team experiments on you.”

Barry tensed and looked at him warily. “They test me some,” he admitted. “To try and understand my powers and how to help me.”

“You said they put you through the wringer,” he pushed. “Your words, Scarlet.”

Barry looked off to the side. “There aren’t a lot of metas lining up to give a blood sample,” he pointed out. “How else are we supposed to understand what the accelerator did?”

“So they made you their lab rat?” he bit out. “I saw how you flinched when we got here, Red. You’ve got a touch of PTSD when it comes to medical procedures. Why haven’t you put a stop to it?”

Barry sighed and his body seemed to curl in on itself. “How can I?” he asked weakly. “The tests they run help me. Keep me healthy. Maybe not all of them, but a good portion of them do, and there’s no way of telling which tests are more necessary than others until we do them.”

“They’re hurting you,” Len objected. 

“They don’t know that,” Barry argued back.

“They should!” Len growled. “Dammit, Barry, your son is scared to go near your team because of what they do to you!”

Barry paled and hopped off the bed. “You think I don’t know that?” he hissed. “You think I don’t know how screwed up it is that I’m sometimes scared of my own friends and family? What would you have me do, Len? I need their help! I tried being the Flash without them and I almost got killed several times!”

“That doesn’t give them the right to treat you like a guinea pig!” he argued, jumping to his feet.

“Why do you even care?” Barry snapped. 

Len clenched his hands by his sides. _Because I care about you._ He forced himself to visibly relax. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

Barry stilled and stared at Len with surprise. “What?”

Len rolled his eyes and sat back down to appear non-threatening. “I’m sorry,” he bit out. “You’re right. You need your team. I just… I don’t want to see you hurt. You’re a good guy. Not a lot of those around.”

Barry seemed to deflate a little. “Thanks,” he mumbled. After a moment he sat down in a chair and dragged a hand across is eyes before giving a weak chuckle. When Len looked at him questioningly Barry sighed. “Sorry, it’s just… I never thought I’d ever hear your voice apologize for that. Leon used to...” Barry looked at Len warily, his voice trailing off.

“Used to what?” asked Len, keeping his tone calm, hiding the intense desire he felt to know more about his counterpart.

Barry sighed and shrugged one shoulder. “He used to get frustrated with me when I didn’t keep a doctor’s appointment or refused to get a check-up. Working with chemicals like I do, he was always worried I was going to get sick or hurt. I never told him about my powers, so he never knew I’m practically immune to disease. Hearing you argue I shouldn’t be getting tested is… refreshing.”

Len knew he looked shocked, but he couldn’t hide how absolutely stunned he felt. “He didn’t know about your powers? How the hell is that even possible?”

Barry looked a little embarrassed. “I hid it. Up until he… until the day they came for us, Leon never knew I was a speedster. I rarely used my speed in that timeline. Whenever I got pent up or had too much energy, I would speed to Nevada and run around the desert until I relaxed. Like I said, there was already a Flash there, so I felt like I could just be Barry, you know?”

“You lied to your husband,” Len pointed out.

“No,” Barry argued. “In that life, I wasn’t the Flash. I didn’t want to be. I wanted to just be me. I made that decision before I ever met Leon. Like someone who can paint but chooses not to. Or someone who has a great singing voice but only uses it for the occasional karaoke night. Loving him didn’t change how I felt about my powers. If anything, it made me more certain I made the right decision.”

“How so?”

“Leon was a thief,” Barry reminded him. “A damn good one. He had powers of his own, which helped him in his heists, but also kept his crew safe. I’m not stupid. He recruited people who could make his job easier. My powers would have helped with that, and I never wanted to put him in a position where he needed to ask me to break the law. I never wanted to be in the position where I would have to say no to my husband.”

“He loved you,” Len pointed out. “He would have understood.”

“Maybe,” Barry said sadly. “But it was easier if he never had to make that choice.”

Len stared at him for a moment. “You think he would have put his crew before you?”

Barry shrugged. “Maybe not the crew, but himself? Wouldn’t you?”

Len felt a surge of anger wash through him. He stood up and moved toward the door. “I haven’t put myself first since the night I warned you about Mardon,” he answered before leaving the med-room.

***

For the next nine days Len didn’t get to talk much with Barry. Ray and Stein took up a lot of his time, working on finding a way to restore Barry’s connection to the Speed Force. They fixed another aberation in the timeline and they made a brief trip to Salvation. Chris had a great time riding on a horse with Hex while Barry seemed to finally relax and stop worrying, if only for a few hours What little time Barry wasn’t with his son or resting, there were always others around, which prevented them from speaking about personal matters.

Surprisingly, he did find himself keeping Chris occupied some. Mick was obviously the kid’s favorite, but Chris had gotten into the habit of asking Len to read to him after catching him reading in the kitchen during breakfast. He doubted the kid had any interest in Greek philosophy, so he found a copy of the Hobbit and spent half an hour reading aloud a couple of times a day. The kid had too much energy to sit still for longer than that at any given time. He also ended up joining the kid and Mick in the fabrication room twice, letting the kid pretend to be a fireman, a robot, a dinosaur, and a cowboy. It took very little time for him to fall in love with the boy. He was too much like his Daddy for Len to resist his charms.

Len watched as Mick picked up Chris and began heading down the corridor to put him to bed for a nap before heading toward the bridge. With luck Barry was around and they could talk some more. He was getting close when he heard raised voices. He paused just out of sight and listened carefully.

“...should have told me he was a time aberration!” Sara snapped angrily.

“He’s my son!” Barry growled. 

“He’s not supposed to exist!” she argued back.

“Well, he does!” Barry said, his tone dripping with ice. “What? You’re going to travel back in time and try to stop that? You can’t. That world is gone! I erased it!”

“Barry, all we’re saying is, there are consequences.” Ray said in a placating voice.

“And I am dealing with them!” Barry hissed. “Do you think I don’t know what’s happened? Of course I know! I knew that changing the timeline would cost me something! The first time I had to watch my mom die again and it cause a black hole to open up over Central. The second time there was a war and I lost my husband! This time I lost my powers. I don’t care! I’d rather have my son!”

“Barry, you’re not thinking rationally,” Sara said firmly.

“Don’t push this!” Barry hissed, his voice full of venom and fury. “I’ll do whatever it takes to protect my son! No one and nothing means more to me! I’d let the whole fucking world burn before I let you risk one hair on his head! Hell, I’d probably steal Mick’s gun and start the fire myself!”

“You don’t mean that,” Stein said hesitantly. “Barry, you’re a hero. You protect.”

“According to Gideon, if your son remains, the future changes,” Sara told him. “You won’t marry Iris. You won’t get your speed back.”

“I don’t plan on marrying Iris,” Barry growled, “and in case you haven’t realized it, my changing the timeline saved your sister’s life! It enabled you to rescue Len. Do you really want to risk that changing back? Central doesn’t need me. Gideon said that someone else takes up the mantle of the Flash.”

“You would make someone else do your job?” Jax asked tensely.

“My job is to raise my son,” Barry answered. 

“Barry, as grateful as I am that Laurel and Leonard are alive...” Sara began.

“No!” he interrupted. “I’m not discussing this any further. You don’t want my son here? Fine. Take us back. Drop us back off when and where you picked us up. I’m going to go repack our things. This conversation is over.”

Len stepped out of the corridor as Barry rounded the center console and headed his way. “Hold up, Scarlet,” he said calmly.

Barry’s eyes flashed with anger, but Len turned to look at Sara. “If Scarlet and the kid go, so do I.”

Barry’s expression turned to surprise. Sara looked at him with disbelief while Ray, Stein and Jax looked confused. “You’re part of this crew,” Sara pointed out. “You’re a Legend. It’s our job to fix time aberrations!”

Len shrugged. “I’ve also been a Rogue, a Legion of Doom founder and dead. I promised to help Barry and his son. Can’t really do that if I stay here while he’s back in Central.”

“I’m going, too,” Mick grumbled, walking into view. 

Barry stepped closer to Len. “You don’t have to do this,” he said softly.

Len looked Barry in the eyes. “Yes, I do,” he said just as softly. 

Mick walked over and stood beside Len. “I’d never forgive myself if I let something happen to squid.”

Sara pinched the bridge of her nose. “Guys...”

“This isn’t a debate,” Len interrupted. “We’re sticking with Scarlet and Chris. Gideon, set course for one minute after you picked us up.”

Mick turned and placed a hand on Barry’s shoulder, guiding him out of the room. Barry sighed heavily. “I didn’t mean for this to get so out of hand,” he mumbled.

Mick shrugged. “Don’t sweat it, Red. Pack up. Lisa is gonna be thrilled to have squid back. Plus, playing bodyguard in case the army or an evil speedster comes knocking? Better chance I get to light someone up.” He smirked when they reached Barry’s room. “As long as you ain’t stole my gun, that is.”

Barry blushed but didn’t shrink away as he looked at Len and Mick. “He’s my son,” he said softly. “Half of me. I’d die before I let him get erased.”

Mick nodded and clapped him on the arm. “You’re a good man, Red. Squid’s lucky to have you for a dad.”

Len waited for Mick to walk off before moving closer. “I never knew what a good father was. Not until I saw you with your son. Get what you need, Barry. We’ll head back to the safe house and figure out something from there.”

He started to walk away, but Barry reached out and grabbed his shoulder. He gave the younger man a questioning look. Barry stared at him for a couple of seconds before sighing and wrapping his arms around Len loosely. “Thank you, Len. You might not believe me, but you’re a good man, too. I’m lucky to have you in my life.”

Before Len could unfreeze Barry disappeared into his quarters. Len slowly dragged a hand down his face before heading to his own room. “Dammit, Scarlet,” he muttered, “you’re gonna be the second death of me.”


	6. A Safe Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry, Len, Mick and Chris return to Central after a disagreement with the Legends.

Lisa hadn’t left yet, so she was able to immediately drive them all back to the safe house. They stopped only long enough to let Lisa pack a bag and call Hartley to cancel a meeting at Saints in two days, then they left for Keystone where Mick had an old farmhouse. It would be dark by the time they arrived, so they grabbed some fast food and ate it on the road. Chris fell asleep about half an hour before they arrived, and Lisa eagerly offered to carry him inside. Mick gave Barry a quick tour before showing him to a bedroom. Barry was just finishing unpacking when Len tapped his ring on the door frame. “Got a minute?” he asked.

Barry nodded and waved him inside. “What’s up?”

“Lisa put Chris in her room. You could challenge her to get him back, but you should know she fights dirty,” he smirked.

Barry chuckled. “I kind of figured that when Mick showed me the room and he wasn’t in here.” He held up a small bundle of clothes. “I was going to take these to her to change him into.”

Len walked over to the bed and sat down, watching Barry carefully. “How are you doing?”

Barry sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Honestly? I’m… I’m tired, Len,” he answered softly. He moved to sit beside Len, his shoulders drooping. “I’m confused. I’m scared.” He smoothed the fabric of the pajamas with shaky fingers. “What if I can’t protect him?” he whispered.

Len held up his hands, palms facing himself and began counting off. “Your Captain. His husband. Hartley. Lisa. Mick. Laurel Lance. Me. That’s seven people, Scarlet. You’re not alone in this.”

Barry turned his head to look at Len. “That’s what’s confusing me,” he admitted. “Why? Why are you doing this? Why put yourself at risk for me and Chris?”

Len looked away. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to.”

“I do want to know,” Barry insisted. “Len, I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to know. Please, I need to know I’m not making a mistake.”

Len stood and began moving toward the door. “Get some sleep.” He was almost to the door when Barry grabbed his arm and turned him around. Len held his breath as Barry searched his eyes intently. Whatever it was he found must have convinced him because Barry’s expression relaxed. He was tempted to ask what Barry saw but froze when Barry gave his arm a slight squeeze and smiled.

“Thank you,” Barry said gently. 

Before Len could figure out how to respond Barry was gone, taking the clothes to Lisa. 

***

They had been at the farmhouse for five days now. Chris was loving it, having so much room to run and play and train. Surprisingly, so was Lisa. She had spent one whole day just weeding out the flower beds and picking berries. (Which she turned into a completely inedible pie.)

Barry had gone into town twice, contacting his team to let them know he was okay, but out of town dealing with a ‘personal issue’. Len suspected it was groundwork for introducing Chris into their lives. Both trips left him weary and quiet for a few hours. Len wished he knew how to help, but Barry was closemouthed about the team and his family.

Without his powers he had to be more careful training his son. He couldn’t take a hit of cold or ice. Mick set up some dummies made of straw and old fence posts for target practice. Len found he was able to help some, as well. With his gun he was able to teach Chris better aim and how to track a moving target. All in all, the five of them were getting along very well. It was surprisingly peaceful.

Len grabbed his phone and looked at the time. 3am. He sat up and swung his legs out of the bed as he listened to the soft, almost silent, footsteps going past the door. He scrubbed at his eyes and stood up to go see how Barry was doing, careful not to wake Mick on the other side of the bed. By the time he got downstairs Barry was already on the porch, sitting on the steps, his head tipped back as he looked up at the stars. Len walked over and sat down beside him, bracing his elbows on his knees and letting his hands dangle between them. 

“Can’t sleep?” he asked.

Barry sighed softly. “When I first got my powers, I was… amazed,” he said, his voice barely audible. “I felt everything more vividly. My powers constantly rejuvenated my skin and nerves. Everything was more intense. The taste of food, the warmth of the sun, a touch. It was all magnified.” He dropped his head and turned to look at Len, hesitation in his eyes. His voice got softer, more fragile. “The pain of a broken bone. A punch to the jaw. A needle piercing my skin.”

Len tensed, suddenly realizing what Barry was saying. 

Barry turned to face forward, drawing his feet up onto a higher step so his knees were level with his chest. He wrapped his arms around them and rested his chin on his left knee. “If I was injured or tired, it was worse. It was harder to process and push through. My pain threshold is high, but pain is still pain. My metabolism made medication useless. I would burn through a triple dose of morphine in seconds.”

Barry stretched out a hand, palm down. “Several years ago I broke this hand fighting a guy with metal skin. When I’m really exhausted, I still feel the snap of Caitlin resetting the bones.” He looked at Len, his chin still resting on his knee. “That’s why I don’t want Chris tested by them. I don’t want him to ever have to suffer like that. That’s why I teach him long range attacks and to run if at all possible. I know I can’t protect him from ever feeling pain, but I can try to keep him from some of it, at least.”

Barry gave a weak smile that didn't reach his eyes. “At first I let them test me because I was hoping they could develop a pain killer that would work, or even just a way to lessen the pain I already felt. Later, I let them test me because I hoped to find a way to go faster or heal quicker so the pain didn’t last as long. By the time I realized that was never going to happen, I had Chris to worry about. The more information they get from studying me, the less they would need to get from him or someone else.

Caitlin doesn’t run tests to be cruel. She really is trying to help. Cisco doesn’t try out his inventions on me to hurt me. I test them because if something goes wrong, I’ll survive and heal. Someone else might not. I know you think I’m an idiot for letting them do that, but what’s the alternative? The fact is, there are people out there, bad people, with powers normal humans can’t fight. I don’t like fighting. I don’t get a thrill from it. But if I don’t, innocent people get hurt or die.”

Len was speechless. What could he possibly say to comfort the very man he had intentionally caused pain in the past? He knew from personal experience how painful his cold gun was. How much worse had it been for Barry? Did he still feel phantom pains from the hits he had taken from the cold gun? 

“Don’t.” Len looked at Barry who had lifted his head and was now watching Len sadly. “Don’t beat yourself up. I don’t blame you. I didn’t tell you this to guilt you.”

“Why did you tell me, then?” he asked, carefully keeping his tone level. 

“Because I want... no, I need someone else to understand. To know why I feel so strongly about hiding Chris. If anything happens to me...” Barry paused and looked away. “I have a Will,” he mumbled. “If something happens to me, I’ve arranged for Hartley to get custody of Chris. He’s going to need help protecting him.” Barry took a deep breath and sighed heavily. “And I know I can trust Lisa and Mick. And you.”

Len sucked in a shaky breath. “Scarlet...” he whispered.

“I know you’re not him,” Barry interrupted. “You share similar physical features, but you’re two entirely different people. You’re Len. The man who infuriates me, challenges me, and yet, inspires more trust than I’ve ever had for anyone else. I’ve shared secrets with you that I have never told anyone else. Secrets I never even told my husband. I need you to understand that I’m not mistaking you for Leon.”

Len frowned slightly as he tried to figure out where Barry was going with this. “I believe you,” he said. “I know you don’t think of me as him.” 

“As long as you understand that I know exactly who I’m with right now.” Barry said. 

Len was about to nod but froze as Barry leaned closer and pressed his lips to his. For a full second he was too stunned to move, but luckily his brain was overtaken by his heart and he wrapped a hand around the back of Barry’s neck and tugged him closer. Len completely lost track of time as he explored Barry’s mouth with his tongue. When breathing became an issue, and they reluctantly separated, Barry sighed softly. He opened his eyes and looked at Len tenderly.

“One last secret,” he whispered. “I loved Leon. I truly did. But I love you, too, Len. I loved you before I changed the timeline and met him and I still love you now. Your horrible puns, your damn smirk, your honor.”

Len felt as if he was going to explode. Barry loved him? He had to be dreaming! There was no way Barry could love him!

“Something is wrong with me.”

Five words. That’s was all it took to shatter the bubble of hope inside him.

“Ever since I lost my powers, I can feel myself getting weaker every day,” Barry continued in a soft voice. “I don’t know if I’ll keep getting weaker until I… I... or if it’s just me reverting back to how I was before the lightning. What I do know is, I am not going to throw away a chance to tell you. I’m not asking you for anything. I’m not offering you anything, either. I just want you to know that I love you. That I think you are wonderful and special and important. You are a great man, Leonard Snart, and I’m incredibly lucky to have known you.”

Len was incapable of moving or speaking. He felt disconnected as he watched Barry stand and begin walking back into the house. _He loves me. He loved Leon, but he loves me, too. Loved me first._ The sound of the door shutting jolted him back. Len didn’t stop to think. He reacted without planning. He jumped up and ran back into the house. Barry was halfway up the stairs when he caught up to him. He grabbed Barry’s upper arms and pushed him up against the wall, capturing his mouth in a heated kiss.

Barry moaned, his lips parting slightly. It was enough for Len to press his tongue inside, deepening the kiss. Barry’s hands slipped around Len’s waist shifting him closer. Len ended the kiss, but only so he could lick and nip down Barry’s neck. Barry was gasping above him, whispering “Len” over and over. He felt a possessive thrill. This was them. Not Flash and Cold. Not Leon and Bart. This was Len and Barry.

Len slid his hands down Barry’s arms to his hips. “Is Chris with Lisa?” he growled huskily. Barry nodded against his lips. “I want you. Let me stay with you?” he asked. Barry nodded again.

He pulled back and grabbed Barry’s hand, leading him up the remaining stairs and into the bedroom. As soon as the door was shut, he turned to kiss Barry again, but paused seeing the tears in Barry’s eyes. “Scarlet?” he whispered.

Barry smiled slightly, moving forward to cup Len’s face in his hands. “Good tears,” he whispered back. “They’re ‘I can’t believe this is happening for real’ tears.”

Len smiled, feeling unusually shy. “Me, either. Never thought I stood a snowball’s chance in hell with you.”

Barry suddenly laughed and wrapped his arms around Len’s neck. “Oh god, the word play! I love it.”

Len grinned and bent enough to lift Barry off his feet. He turned and deposited him across the bed, quickly crawling forward to cover Barry’s body with his. Barry laid perfectly still, watching Len with lust-filled eyes. “Don’t freeze up on me now,” he purred. “I’m going to snow you just how badly I want you.”

Barry chuckled, his hands beginning to stroke up and down Len’s sides. “For a man with such a cold moniker, you sure know how to heat a guy up.”

Len gave him that smirk Barry said he loved. “Let me show you just how hot ice can get.”


	7. Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mick knows just who to go to for help.

“So, you and the hero?” 

Len looked across the table at Mick as he polished his heat gun. “What of it?”

Mick shrugged. “Does this mean I get the bed to myself?”

Len rolled his eyes. “Chris sleeps with Barry most nights.”

Mick stared at Len for a few seconds. “Look, I know you’ve had a thing for him for years, but there’s something you should know.”

“I know about Leon,” Len interrupted. He watched Mick relax, relief in his eyes. It made him feel good that his friend was watching his back, even against Barry. “We’ve talked about him. About their life.” Len hesitated for a moment. “He says he loves me, Mick. He loved his husband,” he managed to say the word without flinching, but it was a near thing, “but he loves me, too. Loved me before Leon.”

“Of course he did,” Mick snorted. “Anyone with half a brain could see that. You two were always flirting. You had a connection long before that blackhole thing he mentioned.”

Len was silent for a long minute while they drank their coffee. “He’s getting weaker,” he whispered. Mick looked up, confusion and worry in his eyes. “Without his connection to the speedforce, he’s in pain. Gideon said he’d never get his speed back. What if he…”

“Gonna live your life on what-ifs?” Mick interrupted. 

He looked up at his long-time partner with exasperation. “I just got him, Mick. I can’t lose him now.”

“Then there’s only one thing to do,” Mick said firmly. Len raised his eyebrows in confusion, but Mick just stood up. “Gotta go see someone. Be back in a few days.”

“Mick!” Len growled, an obvious warning.

Mick looked at Len as he was pulling on his jacket. “Trust me,” he said calmly. “Be back by Thursday, regardless.”

Mick left the house and hopped into his car. His plan was half-assed, he knew. But the thought of Len losing Barry… of squid being without his daddy… No. Mick was gonna do whatever it took to make sure that didn’t happen.

***

Len woke up slowly, his senses alerting him to strange noises. He carefully unwrapped his arms from Barry and slid from the bed, grabbing his gun before creeping into the hallway. He eased down the staircase and peered around the corner.

“Hey,” Mick grunted as he tossed a bag onto the couch.

Len relaxed and stepped into the room, only to tense back up when he spotted the other occupant. “Dr. Snow,” he bit out. The woman was pale, but held her head up, spine straight, as she stared back at him. She was gagged and there was a scarf tying her hands together. Len sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He powered down the gun and walked over to sit on the arm chair in front of the sofa. “Mick...”

The pyro shrugged, unconcerned. “Kidnapped her,” Mick admitted. “Thought she would be the best one to fix Red.”

Len shot him a glare before turning back to the doctor. “Okay. I’ll explain fast, then I’ll untie you. If you scream and wake the kid, I’ll take great pleasure in gagging you again. Barry is here.”

Snow’s eyes widened in alarm and she tried to yell around the gag. Len rolled his eyes and waited for her to stop. Once she did, he began again. “As I was saying, Barry is with us. Willingly.” He ignored her look of disbelief. “As you know, he doesn’t have his speed anymore.” His expression hardened. “Someone stole it, it seems.” He relished the guilt in her eyes. “Since then, he’s been getting weaker. He… we’re worried he’ll continue to get weaker. That’s unacceptable. So, we need you to figure out how to fix him. Now, I’m going to remove the gag. Remember what I said about screaming.”

He reached out and carefully unknotted the handkerchief and dropped it beside him. Snow shifted her jaw a few times before giving him an icy glare. “You kidnapped me!” she hissed.

“No,” Len drawled. “Mick did. I’d apologize, but quite frankly, I’m more concerned with Barry’s health than your feelings.”

“Why would you care about Barry?” she demanded.

“Because I love him,” Len said calmly. “Because he loves me. We’re together. Might as well get used to that now. So, what do you need to figure out how to help him?”

“Love?” she hissed again. “Do you really expect me to believe that? There is no way Barry would be involved with you! You’re enemies!”

“But I am.” All three of them turned as Barry stepped into the room. He was yawning, hair tousled, and obviously still half-asleep as he walked over and squeezed into the chair beside Len. He laid his head on Len’s shoulder as he got comfortable. “Woke up cold,” he mumbled.

Len snorted at the inadvertent pun. “Sorry, Scarlet,” he said softly. “Heard a noise and came down to find Mick and Snow here.”

Barry grimaced as he noticed the scarf around her wrists. “Seriously, Mick?” he grumbled, leaning forward to untie her. “You can’t keep kidnapping my team.”

Mick snorted as he headed to the kitchen. “I’ll make coffee.”

Caitlin rubbed her wrists as she stared at Barry and Len with disbelief. “This is what you’ve been doing?” she demanded. “Sleeping with Snart? Barry, you’re better than this!”

“Keep your voice down,” Len growled.

“Barry’s already awake!” she shot back.

“But my son isn’t,” Barry said firmly. 

Caitlin’s jaw dropped and her eyes grew wide. “What?”

Barry threaded his fingers with Len’s, seeking comfort. “I have a son, Caitlin. His name is Chris.”

***

Caitlin wrapped her hands around the mug Mick handed her, without seeming to realize what she was doing. Her eyes were still wide but unfocused as she processed everything Barry had told her in the last thirty minutes. Barry looked over at Mick curiously while they waited for her to recover. 

“How did you manage this?” he asked with a tired sigh.

Mick shrugged as he sat down on the other end of the sofa. “Trailed her home. When she got out of her car, I told her to get into mine. Didn’t even need a weapon. She just got in.”

“Wait! You weren’t armed?” Caitlin gasped loudly.

Everyone turned back to her. “Of course not,” Mick grunted. 

For a moment, she looked as if she was about to fly across the room and hit him. She bit her bottom lip hard, hands clenched by her sides until she was able to calm down. “I can’t believe this is happening,” she hissed.

Barry slowly stood up, his joints popping loud enough for them all to hear. He grimaced and sucked in a shaky breath. Len was by his side quickly. “Need some pain killers?”

Barry shook his head as he leaned forward and rested his head on Len’s shoulder. “It’s not too bad. If it gets worse I’ll take something.”

Caitlin stood and approached, eyeing Len warily. “Barry? What’s wrong?”

He exhaled heavily and turned to face her. “My joints are stiff. I tire easily. Headaches. Muscles spasms on occasion.” He hesitated for a moment. “I think my body is crashing. All the injuries I had as the Flash have left my body… damaged. My powers kept my body at peak physical health, and now that it’s gone, I’ve been left with the results. I’m almost crippled with pain sometimes.”

A soft cry escaped her lips. “We need to get you back to STAR Labs,” she insisted. “I’ll need to run tests...”

“No,” Len growled.

Barry flinched. “Len...”

“No,” he growled louder. “Whatever she needs to do, she can do here. I’m not leaving you to those assholes again!”

“Len...” Barry sighed.  
“Excuse me!” Caitlin hissed at the same time.

A door opened upstairs and they heard rapid footsteps cross the floor to the bathroom. Len placed a hand on Barry’s cheek. “Go get Chris ready. Mick’ll make breakfast.” Barry nodded and went up the stairs. As soon as he was out of sight Len turned back to Caitlin. “Sit,” he ordered. “There’s some things you need to hear before we let you meet Chris.”

Caitlin briefly considered arguing, but along with the steely determination in both men’s eyes, there was also a great deal of worry. She sat back down and glared at him. “Then talk.”

***

Caitlin took the tissue Len held out and wiped at the tears on her cheeks before stiffening her spine and sitting up straight. In truth, she felt like running out of the room to find a dark corner to hide in. Every word out of his mouth was like a physical slap across the face. She had always known Barry disliked the medical tests, but who didn’t? She had never realized just how horrible it really was for him. The idea that he could still, to this day, feel every needle, every stitch… her stomach churned ominously. She’s a doctor. A neurosurgeon and bio-engineer. She wasn’t supposed to hurt people. She wasn’t supposed to hurt Barry. 

“Don’t,” Len said with exasperation. When she looked up he shrugged. “Barry should have told you how the testing made him feel. He didn’t because he was trying to protect everyone. He thinks it was better for him to be tested than for you to have to put someone else through that.”

“Red’s tough,” Mick added. “Even now, without his powers, he’s the toughest sonovabitch I know. Ain’t gonna let him die, though. So you need to fix this. Squid needs his father.”

“Squid?” she repeated with a grimace.

“My son,” Barry said, walking back into the room. Beside him was a young boy, shyly watching her. “Chris, this is Caitlin Snow. She’s my friend. Caitlin, this is Chris.”

Chris gave a tiny smile before hiding his face against Barry’s leg. “Hi, Miss Snow.”

Caitlin forced a gentle smile on her face, trying to hid her shock. “Hello, Chris. It’s very nice to meet you.”

“Hey, Squid,” Mick grumbled. “Gotcha some pancakes.”

The little boy looked at Mick with a big smile. “And jelly?”

“Of course,” the pyro answered, holding out a hand. Chris ran over and let Mick swing him up into his arms. 

Barry walked over and slumped back down into the chair, yawning tiredly. “Lisa’s still asleep,” he told Len as the older man wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“You should be, too,” Len told him gently.

Barry shrugged and laid his head on Len’s shoulder. “I know.”

Caitlin watched closely as Len rubbed soothing circles along Barry’s back with one hand while the other took hold of Barry’s hand and gently massaged the swollen knuckles. Barry seemed to melt into Len’s touch, eyes drifting closed almost against his will. Soon Barry was dozing and Len eased off the chair to lift Barry into his arms. When he started toward the stairs she followed. 

Len carried Barry into a bedroom and laid him down on the bed. Barry rolled onto his side and mumbled faintly before sinking deeper into sleep. Len sat beside him, carding his fingers through Barry’s hair. “A few weeks ago Eiling tried to kidnap him,” Len said in a low voice. “Hartley Rathaway rescued him. That’s when we found out about Chris. He tracked down me, Mick and Lise and asked her for help rescuing Barry. The only other people who know about Chris are Barry’s boss, his husband and a lawyer in Starling.”

“Why didn’t Barry ever tell us?” she demanded in a whisper. “Where is his mother?”

Len didn’t feel any guilt lying to the doctor. “Sick. As for why the secrets, Chris is a meta. Barry is protecting him. So are we.” Len didn’t like the way the doctor’s eyes lit up. 

“A meta? What’s his power? Is he a speedster, too?”

“None of your business,” Len growled. “He’s a kid, not a guinea pig!”

She flinched back, looking appalled. “Of course not!”

Len sneered. “Can you honestly say you’re first thoughts weren’t on what tests you needed to run?”

Guilt colored her cheeks. “I...”

Len snorted. “And that’s why he never told you.”

After a couple of seconds she seemed to deflate. “I’m a scientist,” she mumbled. “Just because I’m trained to think of science first doesn’t mean I would treat Barry’s son that way.”

Len stared at her for a long, silent moment. “You’re here to find a way to heal Scarlet. Nothing else. Tell Mick or Lisa what you need. We’ll get it.”

It was such an obvious dismissal, Caitlin reluctantly left the room. She jumped slightly when she almost bumped into Lisa Snart standing in the hallway. The vivacious brunette smirked and linked her arm with Caitlin’s. “Let’s talk,” she cooed.


	8. Planning Ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Len and Barry plan a future together while Caitlin struggles to deal with the present.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Len is pretty OOC here, but I don't regret it. He's more open with Barry, more willing to share his emotions and be honest, because he has been confronted with just how easily he can lose this. Knowing Barry is getting worse has made him more determined to go after what he wants, and what he wants is a life with Barry and Chris.

Barry yawned as he sat up. A quick glance at the bedside clock told him he’d been asleep two hours. He slipped out of the bed and made his way downstairs. He was surprised to find the house empty. He stepped out onto the back porch and spotted Mick and Chris tossing a baseball around. Leaning against a support post he smiled softly. He never imagined his son playing catch with Mick Rory of all people.

“Hey,” Len said softly, coming up behind him. 

Barry relaxed into Len as the older man wrapped his arms around Barry’s waist. “Hey, yourself,” he replied.

“How are you feeling?” Len asked, a hint of worry in his voice.

Barry was silent for several seconds before sighing softly. “It was our fifth month together,” he began in a soft tone. “Leon took me out on a boat. We swam and ate a picnic lunch on the deck. Then he proposed to me.” Barry could feel Len tense behind him, so he laid his hands on Len’s to hold him in place. “I’m sure it seemed like only seconds to him, but for me, time slowed down and I can remember how torn I felt. Part of me loved him and wanted to say yes immediately. But this other part of me, the part that has always loved you, was heart-broken.” 

Barry turned and wrapped his arms around Len’s neck. “I cried, Len. Because he wasn’t you. Because I never thought I would have that with you. I thought my Len were gone forever. I hated myself for being in that timeline. I hated myself for being so grateful that I had him. I feel so many things right now. Joy, because you love me. Guilt, because I still hold love for him. Scared, because I never want to lose this. I never want to lose you.”

Barry leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to Len’s lips. “But mostly, I feel secure. Safe. I feel like I’ve finally come home because I know, without any doubt whatsoever, that you, _this you_ , is the best thing that has ever happened to me and Chris.”

Len exhaled shakily. “Scarlet, I can honestly say I am okay with sharing your love with him. After all, he gave you your son. He gave us both Chris. I’m jealous of that, though. I’ve been thinking,” he mumbled, inordinately hesitant, “that maybe, once we’ve got you all healed up, maybe Chris would like a little brother or sister.”

Barry’s mouth dropped open and for several seconds he could only stare at Len in stunned wonder. Slowly he was able to pull himself back together and he swallowed nervously. “Do you… you want… with me?”

Len smiled, amused by how Barry seemed to be both confused and overjoyed all at once. “Yeah,” he said, pressing their foreheads together. “I know it’s fast. We’ve only been together a couple of days, but we’ve been dancing around one another for years. I don’t want to waste more time. Time we might not have. I love you, Scarlet. You love me. We both love Chris. Why put off something we both want?"

Len paused, smiling hesitantly. "I'll be honest, Barry," he said gently, "when Chris showed up and told us you were his dad, I was so damn jealous. Here was this kid, who looked just like you, who was a physical bond between you and someone who wasn't me. I knew before I ever learned about Leon that I wanted that. I wanted that bond with you. Maybe we’ll even get lucky and have a little girl. What do you think of the name Hayley?”

Barry’s smile was blindingly bright. “Hayley. I like it. The name means something to you, doesn’t it?”

Len smiled slightly and nodded. “It's always been a special name for me. Lisa’s favorite movie when she was a kid was Summer Magic, starring Hayley Mills. She watched it over and over whenever it was on TV. When things were… bad, at home, I would sing her this stupid song from the movie called The Ugly Bug Ball. One of the first things I did once I got her away from Lewis was buy her Pollyanna, Parent Trap and Summer Magic on VHS. She still has those old tapes, even though she’s upgraded to DVDs.”

Barry melted into Len, kissing him until they were both breathless. “Yes, Len,” Barry whispered once they parted. “I would love to have a second child with you.”

Len cradled Barry to his chest as he watched Mick and Chris chase each other around the yard. Whatever it took. Whatever they had to do. He was going to do anything and everything to have this life with Barry and Chris and Mick and Lisa. This was his family. 

***

Caitlin looked over the notes she had taken before rubbing at her temples. It had been six days since she had been kidnapped and brought to the farm. Barry had told her he called Cisco and said she was with him, helping him with his personal issue and that he’d explain more when they got back. At first she had been absolutely furious. Nothing seemed to be going right these last few months. Zoom was gone, but he had taken so much from them. Barry was powerless and had disappeared from Central. She was ashamed to admit it, but they all had thought he had taken off to pout after Iris and Eddie’s wedding. Now she finds out that, not only is Barry sick, but he’s also hiding this huge secret other life.

Part of her wanted to be furious at him for hiding that he was a father. They’re supposed to be friends and teammates! However, every time that anger rose up, it immediately drowned in the knowledge that, if she was in his shoes, a hero with deadly enemies around every corner, she would probably have kept a child secret, as well. Of course, then she sees the easy way Barry trusts the Rogues with Chris and she gets angry all over again.

“Are you going to fix my daddy?”

Caitlin jumped slightly and looked over at the doorway. Chris was peeking around the edge of the doorway at her. She gave him a small smile. “I’m trying,” she said gently. 

Chris rubbed at the end of his nose and crept forward a little bit. “Unca Mick told Aunt Lisa you’re super smart. Is that your superpower?”

Caitlin couldn’t help being completely charmed by him. “I don’t have superpowers,” she answered. “I studied very hard to learn what I know.”

Chris seemed to be thinking about that. “I gots powers, but Daddy sayed my real power is my brain.”

“He’s right,” Caitlin told him. “Anyone can have powers, but you have to be smart to use them properly.”

The little boy scratched at his nose again. “Unca Mick doesn’t have powers but he’s like, super smart. He teached me how to make ice walls. Did you know you can hide behind ice walls and be safe? It’s super cool.”

A snort of laughter drew Chris and Caitlin’s attention to the hallways where Len was watching the boy with amusement. Chris grinned widely and scurried over, reaching for Len’s hands. Len lifted him up easily. “Hey, pumpkin,” Len smiled. “Your daddy is going to love hearing you make puns.”

Chris frowned slightly. “What’s a pun?”

“The highest form of humor,” Len smirked.

Chris grinned happily. “Awesome! Guess what! Miss Doctor sayed she’s gonna fix Daddy, Poppa.”

Caitlin was surprised by the way Snart suddenly tensed, then relaxed and smiled tenderly at Chris. “Yes, she is,” he said softly. “Now, Lisa is looking for you. You’re supposed to be practicing your spelling, aren’t you?”

Chris pouted, his bottom lip sticking out. “I forgot. I was looking for my pencil.”

Len ruffled Chris’ hair. “You can get one out of my desk.” Chris grinned widely and wiggled until Len set him down. He took off without another word. Len turned to head the other way, but Caitlin stood up quickly. When he paused and looked at her questioningly, she hesitated only a moment.

“He calls you Poppa?” she asked.

His expression blanked out as he shrugged.

Caitlin tilted her head in realization. “That was the first time he’s called you that, isn’t it?”

Snart lifted one eyebrow. “Have you figured out what’s wrong with Scarlet?” he countered.

Caitlin flinched and looked back at her notes. When she turned back to the doorway, he was gone. Caitlin sighed and returned to her seat. She still needed to look over the notes Barry had written down about his appetite, or lack thereof.

***

Len barely even flinched as Barry wrapped his arms around him from behind. Barry’s chin settled on his shoulder and soft lips pressed against his skin briefly. He leaned back against the younger man and relaxed fully. “Hey, Scarlet.”

“What’s wrong?” Barry asked quietly. 

Len’s lips quirked slightly. “What makes you think something is wrong?”

Barry snorted and pressed a couple more kisses to Len’s neck. “You’ve been out here for almost an hour, staring at the woods.”

Len sighed and placed his hands over Barry’s. “Chris called me Poppa,” he admitted quietly. 

Barry’s soft gasp fluttered by his ear. He stilled and was quiet for several seconds. “Are you okay with that?” he hesitantly asked.

Len turned his head and looked at Barry. “Are you? I mean, I’m not really his father. He had a Poppa.”

Barry reached out and turned Len around to face him. “No. He had a Dada. Do you want to be his Poppa, Len?”

“You know I do,” Len admitted. “God, Barry, I really want that. I want you and Chris. I want to be his Poppa and your husband. I want us to be a family. Daddy, Poppa, Chris, Uncle Mick and Aunt Lisa. And hopefully more kids later on. I want it all.”

Barry’s smile was like sunshine. “Greedy, aren’t you?” he teased. 

“Well, I am a thief,” Len shot back.

Barry pressed closer, aligning their bodies. “You know, Chris is with Lisa. Mick is in the barn and Caitlin is in the office.” He turned his head to nibble at Len’s earlobe before sucking it. 

Len grinned, body immediately tightening with desire. “Are you trying to seduce me, Scarlet?” he purred.

“You mentioned more children,” Barry pointed out mock-seriously. “Babies tend to leave you sleepless and tired. We should probably bank a few orgasms for when we’re too tired to do anything.”

Len laughed loudly as he bent and lifted Barry in his arms. Barry’s legs wrapped securely around his waist as he began walking inside. “I’m more of a ‘taking from the bank’ kinda guy, babe.”

Barry giggled before going back to nibbling and sucking at Len’s earlobe. “You already stole my heart, Captain Cold. Gonna steal my body, too?”

Len carried him up the stairs and into Barry’s room quickly. He kicked the door shut and laid Barry across the bed. He ran his hands down Barry’s chest to his belt. “Already mine, Barry,” he growled.

***

“That’s not a promising look.”

Len, Mick and Barry looked up as Lisa spoke. The brunette was staring at Caitlin, who was hesitating in the doorway. Barry tensed as the doctor looked down at the floor, shoulders slumped. He instinctively reached out and linked his hand with Len’s.

Caitlin looked around the room and took a deep breath. “There is no possible way to give Barry back his powers,” she said in a weak voice. “His cellular structure can no longer sustain the energy. It would be like trying to power a small flashlight with a thermonuclear reactor.”

Lisa paled and her hands trembled slightly before she crossed her arms and gripped her waist tightly. “What are you saying?” she growled.

Barry swallowed, trying to dislodge the forming lump in his throat. “She’s saying that the speed force would overload my body and kill me.” Len’s grip on his hand tightened and Mick swore under his breath. Barry looked at them and gave a small smile. “Hey, it’s okay,” he said, leaning over to press his shoulder to Len’s. “Remember what Gideon said. I don’t get my powers back. I’m okay with that.”

Caitlin chewed on her bottom lip as she moved further into the room. “However,” she began hesitantly, “I may have a way of stabilizing Barry.”

“How?” demanded Len.

“Stem cells,” she answered. “There is a good chance that introducing enhanced stem cells from another meta into Barry’s system would give his meta gene a boost and stop his body’s degradation.”

“So we get a meta to give up some stem cells?” Mick asked.

Caitlin tensed and looked at Barry. “It would have to be someone he is biologically related to.”


	9. Dangers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry has to make a big decision. Submit to a risky procedure that would cause his son pain or continue to deal with the pain and weakness he is suffering from. The problem is, it's not just his life that is affected by his decision.

Len stepped into the bedroom and quietly closed the door behind him. Barry didn’t move from the window, giving no indication he even heard someone enter. He crossed the floor and stepped up behind Barry, carefully sliding his arms around the younger man’s waist. He felt Barry tense then slowly relax back against him. “Talk to me,” he whispered.

“I can’t,” Barry whispered, his voice shaky and weak. “Please, don’t ask me to do that, Len.”

Barry turned, his eyes filled with unshed tears. Len’s heart broke for the agony in his lover’s face. “Barry...”

“He’s my son!” Barry sobbed. “A baby, Len! Please don’t ask me to cause him pain! I can’t do it!”

Len had spent the last hour questioning the doctor about every single aspect of this procedure he could think of. He had tried to view every angle and pinpoint every possible way it could succeed or go wrong. In the end it all came back to just one thing.

“Barry, I love you,” he began softly. He felt his lover tense, but he hurried on before Barry could start talking. “I love you more than anything and a huge part of me wants to be absolutely selfish and demand you do this. I don’t want to lose you when I just got you. Mick and Lisa love you, too. They want you to get better. But, there is one thing, one very important thing, you aren’t thinking about.”

Barry’s eyes held so much stubbornness. “What is that?” he bit out.

“Chris,” Len said gently. “None of us want to cause him any pain. And yes, this procedure would be painful.” Barry started to shift, but Len held him tighter. “But how much more painful would it be for him to watch his father die? You know what it’s like to grow up without your dad, Scarlet.”

Barry froze and his stubborn look shifted to startled horror. “Chris...” he whispered.

Len’s vision was blurry with tears. “Please, don’t leave us, Barry,” he begged. “Please, fight for this. Fight for me. Most of all, fight for Chris.”

Barry clasped Len to him tightly, his thinner frame shaking with the strength of his turmoil. “I need three things,” Barry whispered against Len’s neck. “I need you to do three things for me before we do anything.”

Len nodded quickly. “Anything, baby.”

Barry pulled back and took a deep breath. “I want to go back to Central to do this. The lab has the best equipment. Second, I need to introduce my family to Chris. To you.”

Len tensed and looked at Barry worriedly. “Are you sure, Barry? I can’t imagine they’ll be thrilled by this.”

Barry reached up and cupped Len’s face in his hands. “I refuse to be ashamed of us. I refuse to hide the man I love.”

Len had to fight the urge to just drag Barry over to the bed and ravish him. He took a deep breath and reached up to place his hands over Barry’s. “What’s the third thing?” he asked.

Barry moved his hands so he was clasping Len’s. He drew their hands to his chest and took a deep breath. “I want to change my will. I want to make you Chris’ guardian.”

Len was frozen in place for several seconds. He could see Barry growing concerned, but he was so shocked, he couldn’t speak. When Barry’s hands started to loosen, he tightened his own grip. “No.” Len shook his head and stepped as close as possible. Barry’s eyes filled with tears and rejection but Len didn’t give him time to pull away. “Not his guardian,” he said quickly. “His Poppa. If we’re going to do this, we’re doing it right, Scarlet. Let’s get married.”

“Yes!”

Len blinked twice at the sudden, instantaneous reply. “Yes?”

Barry laughed happily and threw his arms around Len. “Of course, Len! I love you! I want to spend forever with you. Why wouldn’t I marry you?”

This time Len didn’t try to hold back. He lifted Barry off his feet and carried him over to the bed. “Mine,” he growled, covering Barry’s body with his own. 

“Always,” Barry promised.

***

The car came to a stop in front of the loading dock. Len and Barry got out of the front, while Lisa, Mick, Caitlin and Chris got out of the back. The little boy’s eyes were huge as he stared at the building.

“Wow,” he whispered.

Barry smiled and knelt down to pick him up. “Okay, pumpkin?”

Chris moved to wrap his arms around Barry’s neck as he looked at Len. “It’s big, Poppa. Will I get losted?”

Len reached over and ruffled Chris’ hair. “Your Daddy and I would never let you get lost, pumpkin.”

Mick grinned and patted Chris’ shoulder. “And if they did, I’d come find you, Squid. Me and Aunt Lisa, both.”

Chris smiled and rested his head against Barry’s. “Okay, Unca’ Mick.”

Caitlin stepped slightly closer. “Ready?” she asked Barry gently.

Barry clasped Len’s hand in his free one and nodded. “I’m ready.”

The group was silent as they followed Caitlin through the long corridors. Len’s thumb kept brushing the pale skin of Barry’s ring finger, wishing they had found the time to get wedding rings. The wedding wasn’t anything special by society’s standards. They had gotten the paperwork and blood tests, then stood before a judge. It only took four days to go from Leonard Snart and Bartholomew Allen to Len and Barry Allen. Before leaving the courthouse, they also asked Laurel to put together the paperwork for Len to legally adopt Chris as his son. Now they were going to place all their faith in a painful medical procedure that only had a 60% chance of working. Even more importantly, Barry had asked Caitlin to call all their friends and family and ask them to gather at the lab. He was ready to get everything out in the open, once and for all.

***

Len sat in a folding chair beside the bed and closed at his tired eyes. It had been thirteen days since they began the bone marrow transplants that would introduce stem cells from Chris’ hip bones into Barry’s system. Since they began the procedure, Len, Lisa, Mick, Chris and Barry had been quarantined in this same room. Caitlin had explained that both Barry and Chris would have weakened immune systems for anywhere from seven to twenty-one days. At first it was just going to be Len, Barry and Chris, but Mick and Lisa refused to be separated from them. 

Chris was doing well, bouncing back from the painful surgery as only a child could. He spent most of his days watching TV, reading with Lisa or playing with Mick. Barry… Barry wasn’t doing as well. His white blood cell count was rising, but much slower than Caitlin had hoped. He was constantly nauseous, had blinding headaches several times a day and had suffered through four very high fevers already. 

Len was exhausted. He was worried. He was terrified. He was watching his husband, the love of his life, suffer and there was nothing he could do to fix it. And part of him hated Joe West for what was happening now.

Entering the cortex had been stressful. Cisco Ramon, Iris and Eddie Thawne, Joe and Wally West, Harry Wells, Felicity Smoak, Oliver Queen, David and Rob Singh and Hartley were all there, waiting. Iris and Felicity had immediately rushed forward to hug Barry, but froze when they spotted Chris and Len. Joe had gone to pull his gun, but Singh had grabbed his wrist and stopped him. Queen hadn’t reached for a weapon, but he had definitely glanced over toward his bow. 

Then the yelling started. Thirty-seven seconds in, Chris began to cry and Len lost his cool. He placed Chris in Lisa’s arms and told her to get out of hearing range. As soon as he was certain Chris couldn’t hear them, he had snapped at everyone to shut up. 

“Listen carefully because we’re only going to do this once,” he growled. “There is a little boy out there who you have just scared half to death right before he has to be operated on.”

Iris, Felicity, Hartley, Cisco and the Singhs had been appalled. Queen and Thawne looked alarmed, but Joe West was apparently eager for a fight. 

“If you think I’m going to let a criminal dictate to me, Snart...” he sneered.

“Allen,” Barry interrupted.

“What?” Joe asked, confused.

“His name is Leonard Allen,” Barry corrected. “My husband.”

Joe stared at Barry in disbelief. “Is this some sort of joke?” he asked hesitantly.

Barry shook his head as he shifted closer to Len and curled into him. “We’re married, Joe. We love one another.”

Joe stared at Barry for a very long, silent moment before spinning on his heel and stomping out of the cortex. The tension in the room eased slightly. Then Queen had moved forward, staring intently at Barry.

“Explain,” he growled.

Len felt Barry beginning to slump slightly. The trip from Keystone to the lab had been long and tiring. Barry was scared, hurting and weakened. So, he stepped in and answered with the story they had put together. 

“There’s a lot to tell, but I’m going to focus on the main points. The details can wait until Barry’s feeling better. Essentially, Barry recently discovered he is a father. In the intervening months, while trying to gain custody, we became close. Meanwhile, ever since losing his powers, Barry has been ill. Dr. Snow thinks she has found a way to heal Barry. It involves a bone marrow transplant. So, for the next few weeks, we will be here so she can give Barry his treatments.”

“Oh my god!” Iris cried, moving forward to pull Barry into a hug. “What can I do? What do you, Leonard or your son need?”

Len found it hard to hate the young woman when she seemed sincerely worried about Barry and honestly willing to help in whatever capacity needed. Barry had hugged her briefly before moving back into Len’s embrace. He simply asked everyone to keep protecting the city as best they could, and to give them space. 

While Caitlin and Cisco set up the med-room with everything needed, Len had sat on a chair, Barry by his side and Chris in their laps. He watched silently as Barry talked with Queen, Iris and Felicity. He spoke briefly with the Singhs and Hartley. Then, it was time to get started.

Things were going pretty good until the third day. Barry was sleeping and Chris was having breakfast. He was sitting on Len’s lap and the two of them were watching Paw Patrol on Barry’s tablet when the door of the med-room flew open and Joe stormed in. He pointed his gun at Len and began reading him his rights, which woke Barry up. Mick and Lisa had run over and stood between Joe and Len, shouting at him to get the hell out before he spread germs everywhere. 

It was complete chaos. Within seconds Chris was crying loudly. Barry became so stressed, he was throwing up. Joe was shouting louder and louder while Len struggled to calm Chris and Barry both. Len would be eternally grateful to Rob Singh and Harry Wells. They ran in and quickly pushed Joe back out of the room. Joe resisted, but the two men were able to force him into the other room. Caitlin had rushed in and taken over soothing Barry so that Len could cradle Chris and rub his back. Chris’ hands and forearms were frosting over and it took several minutes to help him push back his fear so his powers receded. 

It took a bit to get everyone settled back down, but eventually Barry fell back into an exhausted sleep with Chris curled up beside him. Using the intercom system, Len spoke to Singh and Queen. According to them, Joe had decided Len was manipulating everyone and he needed to rescue Barry from his influence. He didn’t believe Chris was Barry’s, despite the resemblance. Most of all, he thought it was Len, Mick and Lisa making Barry ill in the first place, like they were poisoning him or something. By the next day, Barry had caught an infection and it was slowing his recovery. Len could barely restrain himself from leaving the room and finding West for some well deserved payback.

“Hey.”

Len looked up quickly, relieved to see Barry smiling at him, even if the smile was more tired than happy. “Hey, yourself,” he said softly. Barry reached out a hand and Len took it, scooting his chair closer so Barry didn’t have to stretch. “How are you feeling?”

Barry shifted a little so he was facing Len more. “Pretty good, actually. No headache. No nausea. Throat’s dry, but not too bad.”

Before Len could get up, Mick was on the other side of the bed grabbing a bottle of water. “Hey, Red. Squid’s sleeping or I’d bring him over.”

Barry smiled at Mick gratefully. “Thanks, Mick. For everything.”

Mick shrugged, but looked pleased. “No problem.”

Barry grabbed Mick’s shirt before he could move away. “No, I mean it,” he said firmly. “Without you… Mick, I was giving up. I know it sounds weird to be grateful for you kidnapping someone, but I am. If you hadn’t brought Caitlin...” Barry’s voice trailed off, but both men knew what he meant.

Mick blushed slightly and rubbed his jaw. “Weren’t much,” he said gruffly. “Just lookin’ out for Squid.”

Barry smiled and released Mick’s shirt. “And I’ll never forget it,” he promised.

Len watched as Mick walked away, his expression pleased. He turned back to Barry who was watching him with a soft smile. “What?” he asked curiously.

“I love you,” Barry answered with a smile. “God, Len, I love you so much.”

“Love you, too, Scarlet,” he said softly. He cradled Barry’s hand in his and pressed kisses to the knuckles. “I’ve been so worried,” he admitted in a low voice. 

“I feel better,” Barry assured him. “Better than I have in months. Honest.”

Len nodded, still pressing his mouth to Barry’s hand. “Need to get you a ring,” he murmured. “Show off that you’re spoken for.”

Barry’s hand squeezed both of Len’s briefly. “You need one, too,” he yawned. “Tell the world your mine.”

Len grinned and nodded. “All yours, Scarlet.”

Barry tugged weakly at Len’s grip. “Cuddle,” he demanded.

Len chuckled and stood up, stretching his back and legs before sliding into the bed. He wrapped his arms around Barry’s shoulders and tucked his husband under his chin. Relief filled him as Barry relaxed and sighed softly. This was the first time he had woken up without pain or nausea. Things were looking up.


	10. Recovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry is recovering. Now he, Chris and Len can begin their life together.

Caitlin was confident Barry was on the mend. He’d never be a speedster again, but he was in better health than a month ago. He still tired quickly, but his joints didn’t hurt as bad, his headaches were few and less severe, and his appetite was growing. More importantly, the phantom pains from Flash injuries were lessening. Things were looking up and in the morning, they would all leave the sanitized room. Len was looking forward to finally beginning their married life.

“Barry?” he whispered. Barry made a questioning noise as he nuzzled Len’s shoulder. “What happened to the ring Leon gave you? I notice that sometimes you rub that finger.”

“It’s in a safe deposit box,” Barry answered. “I couldn’t wear it without questions, and I was afraid Iris or Joe would find it, so I couldn’t leave it at home. It’s not valuable except for sentiment. Just a slim silver band with our names inscribed inside.”

Len thought about that for a moment. “So silver, then. But slightly different for us.”

Barry looked up at him worriedly. “Len, I don’t care what kind of ring you give me. I love you, not the jewelry.”

Len shrugged. “I’m not trying to compete, but this way you could wear both and not need to hide the other ring. Like it was a set. I told you, Scarlet, I am grateful to Leon. He was a huge part of your life, and that makes him part of ours.”

“God, could you get more perfect?” Barry mumbled, eyes shining brightly.

“Nope,” Len answered smugly. “Cream of the crop, Scarlet.” Barry laughed softly as he curled into Len more.

***

Chris, especially, had been having a hard time with the restrictions placed on them, unable to run or play outside. He was eager to spend time with Rob and Hartley, who he had only been able to converse with through the intercom system. He missed being hugged by his babysitters. That’s why, as soon as they stepped out of the med-room, he darted past the arms Iris and Felicity held out and launched himself at Hartley. Barry laughed softly as he hugged the two women. Felicity looked disappointed as she watched his son, but Iris was pouting. The ‘bottom-lip-stuck-out-and-arms-crossed’ type of pout.

“I can’t believe he is more excited to see Rathaway than his own family,” Cisco commented snidely from beside Caitlin. He had not been fond of having Hartley hanging around the labs while Barry was being treated. The two men had constantly snapped at one another despite everyone else’s attempts to keep the peace.

Len snorted. “Hartley is family,” he told them, a hint of warning in his tone. “As far as Chris is concerned, that’s his uncle. He loves Hartley just like he loves the Singhs, Mick and Lisa.”

“I still can’t believe you kept all of this from me,” Iris said, turning to Barry. 

“I did what I had to do,” Barry said tiredly. Her eyes narrowed and she looked like she was about to tear into him, but Barry shook his head and gave her a stern look. “Don’t start, Iris,” he said firmly. “I’m protecting him from the Flash’s enemies. Zoom, Grodd, Mardon. There are too many people after the Flash. His safety comes first, before anything else.”

“And you don’t trust us?” she asked, hurt evident in her eyes and voice. “You left without any warning. And then you gave us some crazy tale about needed a break. You could have told us the truth, Barry! We can help! We can protect him!”

“Like you protected Scarlet?” Len growled. A wave of shame washed over the group. Oliver took a protective step toward Felicity as Len’s cool gaze turned to Team Arrow. “You’ve got your own problems in your own city. Understandable. But none of you get to play the guilt game with Scarlet. Not a one of you would have done things differently in his shoes.”

Barry slipped his hand into Len’s and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Look, you can be mad or hurt all you want, but I will not apologize for putting Chris’ safety and needs first. I will not feel guilty for protecting our son.” Len’s heart leaped at Barry’s use of ‘our’. Barry paused and looked at each one of them carefully. “And I don’t feel guilty for deciding to leave Central for a while.”

“Well, you’re back, now,” Cisco pointed out. “Don’t worry, man. We’ll make sure no one gets near him.”

Barry took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I appreciate that,” he said hesitantly, “but there are some things you don’t understand.”

“Like what?” Iris demanded.

Barry looked at Len who gave a small nod, already knowing what Barry planned to do. They had discussed this, in great detail, during the long nights while everyone else slept. “Chris is a meta,” Barry admitted. “He can create and manipulate ice. He’s incredibly powerful, in spite of his age. Len, Hartley, Mick and I have been training him, so he has pretty good control, but he’s still a child, which means that sometimes he gets willful or angry and loses control. It’s not safe for him here. Too many enemies, too many people who want to control metas.”

Barry looked at Len who met his eyes steadily. They had looked at it from every angle and were confident in their decisions.

“We’re leaving Central City,” Barry said gently. Iris gasped and shot Len a furious look but Barry continued before she could voice her objections. “Just a few weeks ago I was almost kidnapped by General Eiling. It’s not safe here for us. I’ll never be the Flash again. I need to learn how to just be Barry Allen again. Len, Chris and I are going to go on an extended vacation. Mick and Hart are going to come with us to help train Chris and keep us all safe. I’ll stay in touch, but I’m not telling anyone where we’re going.”

“This is him, isn’t is?” Iris demanded, waving a hand at Len accusingly. “He’s trying to separate you from the people who love you! It’s classic abuser behavior!”

Len’s gut filled with ice but before he could lash out, Barry was standing between him and Iris. “Don’t you dare!” Barry hissed. “Len would never do that! He would never abuse anyone, much less me or Chris! You have no idea what he suffered! He is nothing like his piece of shit father!”

Len fought back the urge to leave as fast as possible. He could see Mick’s hands clenching as if he was holding his gun. Hartley was curled protectively around Chris. Even Oliver took a step forward, placing himself protectively on Len’s other side. Len was stunned by the gesture. Barry wasn’t done talking, though. 

“Len is the one who kept us safe,” he hissed. “Len is the one who protected Lisa all of her life. Len is the one who gave Mick stability. Len is the one who saved the entire Waverider crew, killing himself in the process. Len is the only reason I’m even alive right now!”

Iris shivered, eyes filling with tears as she stared at Barry. After a few seconds she looked down, shoulders slumping. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. She dashed her hand at the tears on her face before looking up at Barry and Len, both. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I… I’m just worried and scared. Everything is changing so fast. You’re not the Flash anymore. Wally seems to have powers now. Zoom is still a threat. Dad is so angry and closed off. I...” she paused and shook her head. “I don’t want to lose you, Barry. You’re my brother and I love you. There has to be some way...”

“There isn’t,” Barry said firmly. “I have to protect Chris. I want a life, Iris. I deserve it, don’t you think? After everything I’ve been through, I deserve the chance to be happy. Len makes me happy.”

She slowly nodded and straightened her shoulders. “You’re right. Of course you deserve to be happy. So, how do we help?”

“You can’t,” Barry answered. “Not with this part. You said Wally is gaining powers. Help him. Train him, teach him and support him. When it’s safe, we’ll be back. Until then, it’s better for everyone if we start over somewhere new.”

“Will we hear from you?” Oliver asked, studying Barry worriedly.

Barry looked at Len who paused to consider the dangers before turning to the archer. “Not directly. But we’ll make sure to keep you up to date as much as possible.”

“How long until you leave?” Cisco asked sadly.

“Car’s ready now,” Hartley informed them.

“You’re not even going to say bye to Dad?” Iris asked, alarmed.

“No,” Barry said firmly. “Joe wouldn’t accept this, and you know it. He risked Chris’ health, my health, because he thinks he knows better and refuses to believe in me. I’ll talk to Joe when I can forgive him for that.”

Lisa cleared her throat and pointedly looked at the clock. “You need to get moving.”

Barry moved to hug Iris, Felicity and Oliver before walking over and clasping Cisco’s hand. He gave a sharp nod and Cisco’s jaw dropped. “Really?” he whispered. 

Barry nodded and Cisco’s expression went blank. A moment later he dropped Barry’s hand and nodded. “Okay,” the engineer said with a grin. “Got it.”

Barry smiled and took Chris’ hand. “Ready, Pumpkin?”

“Yep, Daddy,” he said with a huge smile. “Hart sayed we gots a new pokemon game for the trip!”

“Excellent,” Barry laughed. He took Len’s hand and looked around one more time. “I love you all.”

Hartley and Mick led the way out of the cortex. Barry didn’t once look back. Oliver turned to Cisco curiously. Cisco gave a shrug and ran a hand through his curls. 

“He let me vibe him,” Cisco admitted. “Showed me the last few weeks.”

“Why?” Oliver asked, although he had his suspicions. 

“To make sure he knew that Lenny and Barry really do love one another,” Lisa answered. 

Cisco nodded. “Man, that was something else. Who knew Captain Cold could be so sweet?”

Lisa snorted. “Just don’t let Lenny know you called him sweet. Only me and Barry can get away with that.”

“He really loves Barry?” Felicity asked.

Cisco nodded, looking relieved. “I never thought I would say this, but thank god for Cold. He’d do anything to protect Barry and Chris.”

* * *

Barry smiled as he watched Chris and Hartley search for shells on the beach, laughing loudly as the water lapped at their feet. Lisa leaned over and laid her head on his shoulder. Barry slipped his arm around her back and gently rubbed her far side. “Okay?” he asked with concern.

Lisa placed a hand over her rounded belly and grimaced. “I’m okay,” she replied. “But just so you know, this is the last time I’m doing you a favor.”

Barry chuckled and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “A favor?” he repeated. “Lisa, my golden angel, favors can be repaid. You’ve given Len and I something we can never repay.”

Lisa laughed softly. “You’ve given us quite a lot, too.”

Barry smiled warmly as he continued to watch Chris. The past few years had been happier than he ever dared dream. Harry and Cisco had found a way to expose General Eiling, earning him a dishonorable discharge and criminal charges. He was currently sitting in Iron Heights. Cisco calling Kara for help and they defeated Zoom. He never expected a perky blonde with cold breath and laser eyes.

Wally had turned out to be quite the hero, even helping to form a league of superheroes. Iris had recently announced her engagement to a writer she met when she did an article on his last novel. The Legends were still fighting the good fight. On occasion Mick went with them, but he never stayed away long. Hartley and Robert, a very nice ornithologist who had come to the island to study migration patterns, had gotten married last year.

“Your kids are kicking my bladder again,” Lisa grumbled suddenly. 

Barry jumped up and reached down to help her to her feet. As they walked passed Mick, Robert and Len, who were putting together a bonfire for roasting smores later, Barry blew Len a kiss. He still had bad days, rarely, where he felt weak or his joints ached, but he couldn’t complain. He had a good life. A great life, actually. A loving husband, a wonderful son, incredible friends, and soon their family would expand to include two more, both girls. 

As they made their way to the house Barry looked down at his rings. A part of him still mourned the loss of Leon. He knew he always would. Len never begrudged him that grief, even sharing in it if only because he understood that Barry wasn’t the type to just stop loving someone. The rest of his heart and soul rejoiced in the love he had gained with Len. Maybe it wasn’t the life he had envisioned when he first became the Flash, but he wouldn’t trade this life for anything else.


End file.
